Will he try to make me get rid of this baby? I don’t think I can, I’d lose a part of myself. But, if I have this baby, I’ve pretty much lost Vinnie. I love Vinnie, but I love myself, and now my child, more. I know I shouldn’t have left like I did. I know it was selfish of me, but I just had to go away, and I’m not ready for everything to be out in the open. Maybe Faye told Vinnie I was pregnant, and now I won’t have to. Maybe he won’t even come after me when he finds out.
Back to feeling sorry for myself then.
I need to go back to the clubhouse at some point to get Colt. I miss him, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to take him to a hotel with me. I left out food and water, and a note to please look after him until I get back. I know they’ll take good care of him for a few days until I find us a permanent place to live. I’m hoping Talon will let us stay with him until I buy a place. Maybe I should move to another country. Then again, I couldn’t really take Colt with me overseas, so it looks like I’m staying. And therefore having to face my problems.
Great.
I sit up in bed, my hands covering my face.
Right now—I’m being a coward.
I guess I just don’t want to see Vinnie’s face, hear the words pouring from his mouth as he says that he doesn’t want him or her . . . doesn’t want us.
But what can I really expect from him? He never even told me that he loves me.
* * *
Talon picks me up from the hotel in a red sports car I’ve never seen before. When I raise my eyebrow at the car, he just smirks and says, “You told me to come alone, so I wanted to make sure no one follows me.”
“Very inconspicuous,” I mutter as he gets out of the car and takes my suitcase for me, kissing me on each cheek.
“You have some explaining to do, baby cuz.”
“I know.” I sigh, getting into the passenger seat as he loads my case. I put my seat belt on and wait for him to get back into the car, wondering what the best way to say this was.
“Speak,” he says softly, after he turns on the engine and exits the parking lot.
“I just want to hide out with you for a few days,” I say, looking at his profile. “Please.”
“That’s no problem, Shayla. What I want to know is: why?”
I clear my throat, then decide to just blurt it out. “Vinnie told me he doesn’t believe in marriage and never wants children.”
“And that’s a reason to run away and hide from him?” Talon asks, confusion marring his brow. “At least he was being honest with you.”
Since when was Talon all Team Vinnie?
“Yes, I agree,” I say, swallowing hard. “I do appreciate the honesty. However, hearing that he never wants children, and that he’d be a terrible father, just before I was about to tell him that I’m pregnant, wasn’t a situation I ever thought I’d find myself in.”
Talon mutters one word that sums up this whole situation. “Fuck.”
“Exactly.”
“Why didn’t the two of you fucking use protection?” he growls, making me cringe. The last thing I want to hear is a sex talk from my cousin.
“I’m on the pill,” I say, scrubbing my hand down my face. “I don’t know, I must have missed one, or something, I don’t even know. But it’s my fault, he trusted me to have it under control.”
I should have just made him wear condoms too. Fucking hell.
“It’s not your fault,” Talon tells me in a gentle tone. “You didn’t do it on purpose. Look there’s no point going over the what-ifs, you just need to handle the situation and deal with the now. What do you want to do, Shayla?”
“I don’t want to get rid of him or her,” I say in a small voice. “I’d hate myself, Talon. I’d think about it every day. It’s not an option for me. If Vinnie doesn’t want anything to do with our baby, then so be it. It’s not like I need money, or anything from him. I can handle everything on my own.”
“Being a single mother is hard work.”
“I know.”
I’m lucky that I don’t have to work—I can easily be a full-time mother and live off the money my father left behind, getting a job eventually. I can always do bookkeeping, although accounting didn’t really work for me the first time around.
“So what, you told Vinnie, then bailed? He rang me, fucking frantic, wondering where the fuck you are,” he says, sounding like he feels sorry for Vinnie.
I wince and look out the window. “I didn’t tell him.”
“You what?” Talon practically yells now.
“I didn’t tell him! I panicked, and I left, okay? I didn’t want to watch him get angry or to tell me to kill my fucking baby because he doesn’t want it! I don’t want to hear it, Talon. Imagine hearing those words from the man I love.”
Talon curses under his breath and slams his hands down on the steering wheel.
“Is it safe for me to come to the clubhouse?” I ask him. “I know you had your own shit going on there . . .”
“Vinnie is not going to want you staying at the Wild Men clubhouse,” Talon says, green eyes pinning me to my seat. “I’m going to become public enemy number one for bringing you there.”
“I can stay at a hotel, but I want to bring my dog with me wherever I am.”
“I’m not going to take you to the clubhouse, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to look after you. I have a house you can stay in—consider it yours, all right? I’ll move in there with you for however long you need me, but to be honest, I don’t think that’s going to be very long.”