I kiss his neck and wiggle even closer to him, soaking up his warmth and his clean, amazing scent. “I’m really sorry you thought I was a part of that accident. From now on, I’ll keep my ringer on.”
He suddenly stiffens against me, and it occurs to me that he hasn’t said a single word since he got here.
“Are you okay?”
“No.” He grips my shoulders in his hands and sets me away from him, then walks to my window, facing away from me. He shoves his hands in his pockets. “No, Addie, I’m not okay.”
“Is this about yesterday?”
I frown and watch him as he stands perfectly still. He’s not looking at me. He’s completely closed off. He simply shakes his head no and sighs.
“Are you not speaking to me?” I ask incredulously.
He sighs again and turns to me now, looking at me with resigned, bloodshot eyes.
“Have you slept?” I ask, frowning.
“No,” he replies.
“Why not?”
His hands are still in his pockets. I walk to him, but he immediately walks away, out of my reach. “Why won’t you let me touch you?”
He shakes his head and sighs. “My life is busy, Addie.”
“All of our lives are busy, Jake.” He rubs his hand over his lips, then turns to me and all I see is a stranger. I don’t know this man staring at me with empty, emotionless eyes. “Are you saying you need time away from me? We have been spending a lot of time together—”
“I don’t want time away from you,” he whispers.
“I know you’re attracted to me.” Why is my voice shaking? And why do I want to beg him to stay? I fucking hate this!
“Look at you,” he murmurs, with a sad half smile, gesturing at my outfit. “That red blouse shows off your tits perfectly, without actually showing me your tits. How the fuck do you do that? Did you learn that from modeling?”
I simply nod.
“I thought so. But you’re beautiful no matter what you wear. You could wear a burlap sack and my dick would be clamoring for you.”
“Thanks. I think.”
Pure emotion is rolling off him in waves. “That’s not our issue at all, Addison.”
“What is our issue, Jake?” I approach him now, grip his shoulders, and look him in the eye.
“I can’t do this,” he murmurs.
“What can’t you do?” Are you fucking kidding me? He’s bailing. He doesn’t even have to say the words, I can see it written all over his face. I love him. I gave him everything, learned to trust, and he’s bailing.
“I can’t do us.”
“Well then, you’ll need to leave.” I keep my face perfectly clear of any emotion and my body doesn’t move, until he’s gone and I shut the door behind him.
I sit blindly at the dining room table and brace my head in my hands. I’m too stunned for even tears to come, and I’m not even sure why. Why does this surprise me? This is what happens. People leave.
The only person I can depend on is me.
“PASS ME THE bottle,” I say, reaching toward Kat for the bottle of tequila she just opened. All five of us are sitting on Cami’s living room floor, getting drunk. We each have a shot glass, and a fork for the chocolate cake sitting in the middle of us. “Thanks for coming, guys.”
“Hey, we have rules,” Riley says, watching me pour some tequila in my glass. “If there is a death, a birth, or a breakup, we come. No questions asked.”
I nod, then throw back the shot, enjoying the way it burns down my throat.
“Besides,” Cami says with a grin as she takes a bite of cake, “I enjoy our she-woman-man-haters club nights.”
“I’m not a man hater,” I say with a shake of the head. “The one I love is just dumb.”
“Totally dumb,” Kat says, raising her glass in salute, then shoots the liquor back.
“Did he say why he was dumping you?” Mia asks. She’s lying flat on the floor, staring at the ceiling, her long, dark hair spread out around her like a halo.
“Not really.” I shrug, and take the bottle back from Riley. “He ranted for a while about having to be away from work too much, and some other stuff that I didn’t quite understand, and then he just said he couldn’t do us and left.”
“That doesn’t make any sense,” Cami says with a frown.
“You keep that bottle,” Kat says and returns to Cami’s kitchen for more liquor.
“Is there any of that whipped vodka in there?” Mia calls out. “I want something sweet.”
“Yes,” Kat says with a grin as she returns with the bottle Mia asked for, along with a can of whipped cream. “There’s this too. It has alcohol in it.” She sprays some of the whip in her mouth and hands it off to Cami, who takes a bite of cake, sprays some whip on it, and stuffs it all in her mouth.
“I hate it when men are dicks,” Riley says with a frown. “Like, why do they have to be dicks?”
“Because that’s what they’re thinking with. Their dicks,” Mia says with a sigh, then swigs directly from the bottle before passing it back to Kat. “It’s like they don’t know any better.”
“Bullshit. They know better.” Cami points her fork at Mia. “Dickery is a chosen attitude.”
“Dickery.” I snort, then laugh out loud. God, I can’t feel my lips. I shrug and take a swig of tequila out of the bottle. “I just hate it when they just leave.” I fling my arm out, driving my point home. “They just leave, and you don’t know why. There is no reason. I mean . . .” I scrunch up my face, trying to find my words. “Maybe there’s a reason, but they don’t tell you.”