The coordinator lined everyone up. Jack’s mother would be seated first, escorted by a family friend; then Margot’s mother, escorted by Margot’s brother, Buck. Once they were seated, Jack and his two brothers appeared at the front of the church, and Jaime and I immediately grabbed hands. They were all handsome, but Jack was breathtaking in his black custom suit. Margot’s perfect match.
I was next.
When I got the nod, I took a deep breath and walked slowly down the aisle, smiling at people I recognized and struggling not to cry. I saw Theo sitting with my parents and my grin got wider. He looked gorgeous in his suit and tie—the same ones he’d worn the night of Elyse’s wedding. I hadn’t seen it since then, and I almost laughed out loud at the memory of it strewn all over my living room.
We’d come a long way since then.
When I reached the end of the aisle, I met Jack’s eyes and gave him a smile. He looked nervous, way more nervous than Margot had seemed.
Jaime joined me at the front of the church, and we held hands as we watched the flower girl, Jack’s niece, come up the aisle, followed by his adorable little curly-haired nephew, serving as ring bearer. When Jack saw the kids, he lit up, but it was nothing compared to the way his face changed when Margot appeared at the foot of the aisle on the arm of her father.
He was transformed, watching his radiant bride come toward him. And when she met his eyes, even Margot’s composure seemed to slip, her bottom lip trembling. Jaime and I lost it, both of us frantically trying to save our eye makeup with our hankies as tears leaked from our eyes.
We managed to sniffle only once or twice during the vows, but fell apart again when everyone was asked to rise and the officiant presented us with “Mr. and Mrs. Jack Valentini!”
It’s real, I thought as the entire church burst into applause and cheers. Love is real and it’s powerful enough to conquer any odds. I caught Theo’s eye one last time, as I walked back down the aisle on Jack’s brother Brad’s arm. He winked and smiled as he applauded, and my heart threatened to burst wide open.
I love him, I thought, tearing up all over again. I love him and I’m going to say the words. Why should I hold back? What was there to be afraid of? Embracing Margot and Jack at the back of the church, I felt even more certain. Love was a beautiful thing, and today was all about celebrating it. I wouldn’t care if he didn’t say it back. I loved him, and I wanted him to know it.
Tonight.
Thirty-Two
Theo
* * *
“Have you been OK?” Claire looked up at me, concern in her eyes. She’d been busy all day and most of the night with bridesmaid duties, but I finally had her to myself on the dance floor, wrapped in my arms as we swayed to an old standard.
“I’ve been fine,” I promised her. “Your dad and I have been discussing the Super Bowl.”
“Still?” She wrinkled her nose.
“Yes. For football fans, it’s kind of a big deal. But I’m much happier now that I have you to talk to.”
She smiled radiantly, stars in her eyes. “Me too.”
I wasn’t much for public affection, but I couldn’t resist dropping a quick kiss on her lips. “I love when you wear the red lipstick. It reminds me of the first night.”
Her scarlet smile widened. “Oh yeah. God, that night seems so long ago, doesn’t it? I was thinking earlier when I saw you were wearing that suit, we’ve come a long way.”
“We have,” I agreed. The memory of wanting to be with her and telling myself I couldn’t was sharp.
“Are you happy?”
“Of course I am.”
“Good. Because I am too.” Her cheeks were pink, and her voice went a little breathless. “I’ve never been this happy. I’ve never felt this way about anyone.”
God, she was so beautiful. I was so lucky. Pulling her in a little tighter to my chest, I pressed my lips to her temple.
“I’m in love with you,” she said softly. “I know we haven’t been together that long, and maybe it’s crazy, but it’s what I feel.”
I’d stopped moving, and she leaned back at the waist to look at me. “Are you OK? Was it too soon to say that?”
“No,” I managed. My body had gone completely still, like a rabbit under the shadow of a hawk. But I wasn’t scared. I didn’t know what I was. I felt strange in my skin.
“Then what is it?”
“No one’s ever said that to me before.” I don’t know if I’d even realized it. “I’m just feeling a little…off balance.”
“But not upset?” She looked worried, as if she might have insulted me with her love.
“No. No,” I repeated, my feet suddenly remembering to move. I kissed her trembling lips. “I promise you, I’m not upset. Maybe a little surprised, but not upset.”
“Whew. OK good,” she breathed, tucking herself against me, laying her head on my shoulder. “I wanted you to know how I felt.”
We stayed on the dance floor for another song, but I wasn’t listening to the music. I don’t even know how I managed to keep a rhythm. I felt like two different people—someone who loved hearing those words and wanted to hear them again, and someone who was trying not to panic that the words came with certain expectations and I was in over my head.
In a way it was like tasting something unfamiliar, something you’d never even seen before, that turns out to be delicious. You take a bite, let the flavor and texture roll around on your tongue, chew it up, swallow, and your body sends a message to your brain—we like this! Give us more! But the brain might caution restraint—hold on there, we don’t even know what this is yet, it could be poisonous.