Amazingly, though, we made it without injury and he deposited me gently on the bed. He honestly didn’t look any worse for wear, and his lustful look implied I’d better kick my insecurities to the curb. Shit was about to get real. Yowza!
“You’re wearing too many clothes,” he growled while gazing at me from his elevated viewpoint at the side of the bed. “Lose the pants and the blouse. I’ll take care of the rest.”
Holy shit. It seemed someone was putting on his alpha pants.
His gritty voice and confidence were such a freaking turn-on that I couldn’t comply fast enough. Clothes went flying and, lying there in my panties and black tank top, I looked up at him from my bed and couldn’t quite believe this was happening. I couldn’t even remember my last sexual encounter, which I’m sure I should have found depressing but, at the moment, my mind was very much otherwise occupied.
“You’re so fucking spectacular.” His pupils were large in his intense blue eyes.
Was this real? Nobody had ever looked at me like this before.
Still fully clothed, Nate leaned down and kissed my belly. He pushed the material of my tank up with his nose and began to run his tongue along my stomach, over my belly button and then across the top of my panties. “You smell so good,” he murmured and then lifted my tank to reveal my black lace bra. He pulled the shirt over my head and then returned to hover over my breasts. “I can’t believe how perfect you are,” he said almost reverently. His eyes shifted up to mine and burned through me. “May I?” he asked, and I felt so stunned and unsure, my hands just rested at my sides while he explored my body. I think they were as shocked as I was.
“Yes,” was all I could manage.
His fingers grazed gently over my lace-covered nipples and they pebbled at his light touch. His lips then replaced his fingers and he began to lick and suck me through the lace. I couldn’t stand it any longer and had to reach to my shoulders and pull the straps down so he could gain full access to my aching breasts. He groaned at the first sight of my dark rosy nipples before he covered them with his lips and tongue. I cried out when he lightly bit each one.
My hands, finally recovered from the shock of Nate’s laser-focused attention, reached for him and I was beyond frustrated when I realized again that he was still dressed. Determined to remedy that, I clutched the hem of his t-shirt, skimming the dusting of hair on his lower belly in the process. I quickly stripped the shirt over his head and within a millisecond my hands were tracing every hill and valley of his shoulders, chest, and abs. Perfection. God, he was firm and smooth and his skin was incredibly sensitive if his occasional shivers were any indication. I could caress him all night and never get bored. Of course, I’d have to invite my lips and tongue to participate as well. I circled one of his nipples with my tongue and he responded with something between a groan and a laugh. God, I loved that.
Soon my playtime was over, it seemed, because his hands firmly gripped my wrists and held them to the bed while his mouth dove down to the waistband of my panties and took the lace between his teeth. He looked up into my face and I swear, at that instant, life as I knew it stood still. I don’t know what it was but something profound, something more than sex or teasing or friendship, gripped at my chest and I found it hard to breathe.
What did this mean? I’d never experienced another feeling like it, and I could see in his eyes that Nate sensed it too. I felt heady and strange and his look told me he was similarly afflicted.
“Mommy?” The door creaked open.
No no no no no! Rocco! I can’t believe we didn’t lock the door!
For some damn reason, kids don’t understand that they are not allowed to interrupt epiphanic moments. I threw a sheet over my body and did my best to kick Nate onto the floor. (So sorry, Nate!)
“What’s wrong, buddy? Why aren’t you asleep?” My heart was beating out of my chest.
“There are two reasons, but I can’t ‘member the first one.” Ugh. “I know the second one is that I need to bring a pack of new crayons to school tomorrow,” he said as he climbed onto my bed, not noticing the shirtless man on the floor at the other side.
“That’s already in your backpack, sweetie,” I told him.
“I think the first reason is I need to sleep with you, but I don’t ‘member for sure.”
Nate and I had been on the precipice of something profound—but it was over for tonight. And while one part of me was screaming to get it back right this second, the other decided to be more rational. I was surprised I’d let things go so far in the first place, except for the fact that I was insanely attracted to this man and felt this intense pull toward him.
I maneuvered my way off the bed with the sheet still wrapped around me, and tucked Rocco in with the remaining covers. I then pretended to be a statue until his eyes closed and his breathing slowed. Nate, who had also been impersonating a statue—one that probably sported some bruises from his abrupt tumble to the floor—waited for my signal and then we both snuck out of the room. He pulled his shirt on as I walked him to the door. I wasn’t used to having hormones coursing through my body like girls gone wild, so I was kind of twitchy during our goodbye.
He took my face in his hands. “I don’t have to tell you that I’m really looking forward to our date tomorrow night. Is 6:30 still okay?”
I almost wanted to tell him to pick me up at 6:30 AM so we could finish what we’d started but I put my libido in check and agreed, “Sounds great.”
He kissed me gently on the lips this time, and the contact was way too short. “Can’t wait to see you tomorrow.”
This was too perfect. I needed to come back down to earth. Any minute now, the wicked stepsisters would storm in and ruin my gown, and some super-hot girl (who did not have any baggage) would capture Nate’s attention and steal him away. And then they’d both go riding off into the sunset back to Texas. That’s how it works. What was I doing getting all excited?!
Still, I went to sleep with an internal happy dance and a big fat smile on my face.
Tonight was the night.
“Tonight is the night!” Fiona shouted. “Laney’s gonna get laaaiiid, Laney’s gonna get laaaiid!”
“Do you say anything anymore without the ‘nanny-nanny-boo-boo’ tone? I feel like we’re eight years old.”
“Well that would be extremely inappropriate given the subject matter.”
This time I was at Fiona’s where I could make use of her fashion arsenal. She was helping me with my hair and makeup, and then I’d dash home in time for Nate to pick me up. Gavin was getting Rocco from daycare and babysitting tonight so everything was organized. Except my nerves—they were in complete disarray.
“Am I moving too fast? Should I be doing this so soon?”
“Listen, the man defended your kid to a dickhead bully and then offered to build him a treehouse. I’d say you owe him at least a blowjob for that alone.”
“Stop being so sentimental—you’re gonna make me cry.”
“Oh! Did I tell you Terrence is coming to town this weekend?” Fiona waggled her brows and did a booty shake—well, as much as she could with her non-existent booty. Terrence was Fiona’s on-again-off-again “friend with benefits” or “fuck buddy” or “boy-toy” or whatever she was calling him these days.
He was a pilot and he was also a very fine specimen—tall, dark, handsome, with lean muscle. And while he didn’t have a dimple, he did have this weirdly awesome slightly crooked smile that somehow always made you feel like you made him happy just by standing in front of him. In other words, he was a sweetheart, and besides the cool smile and all the rest, he had the most flawless deep brown skin I’d ever seen. There had been more than one occasion when I’d had a bit too much to drink and had oh-so-casually run my hand down his arm just so I could feel it. Fiona caught me every time but she thought it was hilarious—she would, considering after all the drinking was done, she got to go home to all that was Terrence. So it was a mystery to me why Fiona insisted on keeping things so light between them. I thought he was great for her.
“Fun ahead!” She continued the shake. “And I ordered the sweetest little silk Brazilian briefs from La Perla—they are the lightest pink with these lace panels—Oh! And I saw this ice blue bra and panty set that would look killer on you—please, please let me buy it for you!!” Her face fell at the shake of my head. “You’re such a party-pooper.”
There were certain things I would let Fiona and her endless money treat Rocco and me to, but La Perla? Not gonna happen.
“Hmm, I can’t decide if he and I will go out or just order in and spend the whole weekend thinking up creative indoor activities. I hope the panties come before Terrence,” she said.
Sometimes it was just too easy—I bit my lip to keep from laughing. “Well, it is still in the eighties most days so you’d really be saving yourself from the risk of sunstroke. It’s the only responsible thing to do.”
“I think you have an excellent point. So, what are we doing with this hair?” She led me to her vanity—yes, of course Fiona had a vanity.
“I don’t want to look like I’m trying too hard so keep it simple if you can help yourself. And I’m wearing jeans so I don’t want any arguments! It’s just dinner at his apartment.”
“Fine,” Fiona pouted and ran a brush through my long hair. “But at least be civilized and borrow some of my jewelry, will you?”
We both regarded my reflection in the mirror as she twisted and pulled my hair, deciding on a style. A rock suddenly settled in my gut. My hands went to my cheeks.
Fiona dropped my hair and her hands held my shoulders. “What is it, Laney?”
“I don’t know what I’m doing here. I just feel this, I don’t know, pull toward Nate but I know he’s going to break my heart. Rocco and I are going to get attached to him and then his dad will get better and he’ll move away. You know I’m already worried about Rocco enough as it is, and here I am setting him up for another fall. What kind of mother am I?”