Before I even have a chance to try and catch up, he lets go of my waist and slides a finger over my clit, petting it twice, and that’s all it takes to set me off like dynamite.
I explode outwardly, until I feel like there is nothing left and he explodes into me. I can feel him inside, hot and potent as I throb mercilessly around him, my nails digging so hard into his shoulders as I ride him out I know they’re going to leave marks tomorrow.
My heart is huge, filled with stars and bliss.
This man. This gorgeous specimen of a man, who fucks me with all he has.
I want this man forever.
“Blake,” I whisper, trailing off because I can’t catch my breath, because I know what I want to say but I don’t know how to say it.
He’s breathing heavily into my shoulder and I run my fingers through his hair, loving the feel of it, loving everything he is.
“That feels so good,” he murmurs.
“Better than the sex?”
“Nothing is better than that.” He lifts up his head and gazes at me with sated eyes. He gently brushes this thumbs over my cheeks. “I don’t know how to top that.”
He’s got that look I love in his eyes, the one only I bring to him. Sleepy, relaxed, happy. Absolutely satisfied. But there’s tenderness brimming underneath, something rare and beautiful, like a key that makes my heart want to burst free, like a bird from a cage.
I smile shyly, suddenly feeling like it’s all so much, too much, and if he wants to he can just reach into my soul and walk around in it, examine every inch of who I am and then just walk away.
“We should get back,” I tell him.
He nods, brows knitting together for a moment. “Of course.” He gently lowers me to the ground and then takes a wad of toilet paper, running it up the inside of my legs where I can feel him drip down. It’s such an intimate gesture and yet quite crude at the same time. Pretty much like Blake himself.
We give ourselves the once over in the mirror. He smooths down my dress, I straighten his shirt. We head back outside.
Heath and Rio are still talking and barely look up at us when we return. I know it has to look pretty obvious—the two of us have flushed faces and dilated pupils – but I don’t really care anymore.
Later, while Heath goes down the alley to smoke a joint and Blake goes with him, Rio tugs at my hair, much like Blake did earlier. Only this time it’s not fun.
“You guys,” she says, tugging with each word, “are totally fucking.”
“Ow,” I tell her, ripping my hair out of her hand. I smooth it back, pouting at her. “Well, it was hard not to be obvious about it. Though I suppose I could have said we were at the bar doing shots or something.”
“No, not now,” she says. “I mean, of course you just had a bathroom quickie. I’m talking about before this. You guys have been seeing each other, haven’t you?”
“We’re just friends,” I assure her, having a drink of water.
“Friends with benefits?”
“Something like that.”
“I don’t believe it. It’s something more. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. I’ve seen the way you look at him. You guys aren’t just friends.”
I feel my cheeks flame and hope the low lights of the patio hide it well. “I don’t know what else to tell you.”
But I do.
I could tell her the truth.
I’m falling in love with him.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Blake
“You were in the bathroom for a pretty long time. Food poisoning?” Heath asks all too innocently.
We’re walking back from the bar to my place. I really wanted Amanda to come home with me but Heath is staying over since he got a new apartment in Langford, out of the way, and getting a cab was proving to be way too difficult tonight. God I wish they had bloody Uber in this city.
I don’t say anything to Heath. I assumed he was preoccupied with Rio, but it was pretty obvious why Amanda and I disappeared for a while. And honestly, I don’t want to get into a discussion about her. She’s way too personal of a topic now. I want to keep her as close to my heart as possible.
“Dude,” Heath goes on. “I have to commend you. She’s pretty fucking hot. I’m amazed you’ve been able to keep it in your pants all this time.”
I suck on my teeth loudly and his eyes flit to mine. “Have you been banging her this whole time?” he asks.
“We’re just friends,” I try and explain, even though I know we’re anything but. Even though having sex in a public restroom is nothing new to me and by no means romantic, that meant something. That said something about us. How badly we want each other and need each other. It nearly killed me to be at the same table as her and pretend like she wasn’t more to me than a casual fuck. She’s not that at all and I don’t know how to process it other than to screw her silly.
Maybe that’s been our problem. Every time some inkling of a feeling pops up we jump right into bed with each other and fuck it out of our systems.
But you can’t ignore something like that forever.
I fear something like that only comes along once in a lifetime.
I was hoping the fresh air from the harbor on the walk home would help but Heath’s yapping mouth is muddling up my thoughts.
“Just friends,” he muses. “A fuckgirl. Have you had any other fuckgirls while you’ve been giving her the D?”
“It doesn’t matter.”