And then I see her eyes.
She’s been crying.
She also looks like she wants to slice my head clean off.
“What happened?” I ask, immediately fearful.
She tries to swallow, her jawline growing tight. “How could you?” she whispers, her words caught in her throat, her red-rimmed eyes filled with pain. “How could you do this to me?”
I blink at her. “What?”
I wish I could think faster, that my hangover didn’t have a hold on me.
Autumn. Is it Autumn?
Does she know that Autumn kissed me? But how?
“Come in,” I tell her, gesturing to the house. “Please. Let’s talk.”
She hesitates. She’s almost afraid. It’s now that I realize she looks like she just crawled out of bed. She’s in her pajama pants, flip flops, an oversized Mad Men Studios hoodie. She’s got no makeup on, her hair is a mess. She’s so completely vulnerable, fragile yet brimming with so much animosity that I’m not sure how to handle her, what to do.
“Please tell me what happened,” I say.
At that her eyes narrow. “I can’t believe you,” she mutters bitterly.
But at least she walks inside.
I quickly shut the door as she walks into the middle of the room, looks around.
“What are you looking for?” I ask her.
“Is she here?”
I run my hands down my face and sigh. “Is who here?”
“Autumn.”
I give my head a slight shake, knowing I have to tread carefully now. “No, Alyssa. She’s not. Why would you think she’s here?”
She sniffs, her face crumpling. “How could you do this to me?”
“Baby, please…”
“Don’t baby me!” she cries out, back to vicious. “Don’t play dumb!”
“I just woke up, Alyssa! I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You haven’t seen your emails?” she asks, nearly breathless.
Now I’m extra worried. “No. Phone is dead. Why? What…?”
She folds her arms across her chest. “Go and look. I’ll wait.”
It feels like my heartbeat is doubling up as I stride across the room and pull out my MacBook from the shelf. I bring it over to the kitchen island beside her and open it, then open my emails.
There’s an email there from a name, Kristoff Gantz, no subject but an attachment.
I glance at her.
“Open it,” she says in a hard voice, eyes like steel.
I click on it.
There’s only a few lines of text. A few lines that turn my world upside down.
* * *
I had the pleasure of taking these photographs last night. I know that is your publicist, not your girlfriend Alyssa Martin. If you don’t wire me 50,000 to the bank account below in forty-eight hours, I will release the pictures to the public.
Kristoff Gantz.
* * *
My heart sinks.
Do I even dare click on the attachments?
I look over at Alyssa. “Alyssa…”
“Look at them,” she says.
Her voice is practically shaking.
I ready myself and click.
There are four of them. All taken from the same angle, a low angle, like he was crouching at the edge of the other trailer.
Every single one looks completely incriminating and in every single one we’re kissing.
It doesn’t matter that I know that the kiss only lasted a few seconds before I broke it off.
It looks like it lasted a hell of a lot more than that. The photos only tell half the story.
But is that a story that Alyssa is willing to believe?
I look at her, feeling my heart hanging in the balance.
This can’t be over, not because of this.
I lick my lips. “You have to let me explain,” I say quietly.
She stares at me. “I don’t want to hear your explanation. You said you were working last night, Emmett! Your last day on the job! I was hoping that maybe when you got home, I could take you out to celebrate. But you never called me. And now I know why. Jesus…”
With each word, it sounds like she’s dying.
“Alyssa,” I say, putting my hand over hers but she yanks hers away.
“Don’t touch me,” she sneers. “Don’t you dare touch me after you kissed her. You…god!” she screams and pulls at her hair. “I’m such an idiot! I am such a fucking idiot, I actually believed you. I actually believed in us. And it was all a lie.”
“You’re jumping to conclusions.”
“You’re fucking kissing her! Tell me those photos are manipulated then!”
“They are!” I yell. “We only kissed for a second.”
“Oh my god, you admit it!” she shrieks, turning her back to me and walking across the kitchen. “I can’t believe you.”
“Well if you just let me explain what happened,” I cry out weakly. There’s nothing but pure panic rising in my chest, fluttering around in a flurry of wings. Holy shit. Is this really happening?
“Explain?” she says, whirling around. “Explain what? You just said you kissed her, what else could you have to add to that?”
“For one, she kissed me.”
“Oh she did? She took advantage of you, is that it?”
“I was drunk.”
Fuck. That was not the right thing to say.
She stares at me, blinking, her mouth open. “You were drunk,” she eventually says. “So when you’re drunk, you go around kissing girls. So that’s a thing you do.”
“No,” I protest. “It’s not…I thought she was you for a second.”
Alyssa’s laugh fills the room, so bitter, sour, laced with hatred for me.
“Well I am so fucking flattered. Emmett…I wanted to expect more from you, I really did, but somehow I’m not surprised.”
Now I’m starting to get mad. “Wait a minute, that’s a low blow.”
“You deserve a low blow.”
“You expected me to do something like this?”
“And you just did it!”
“Alyssa,” I say, breathing heavily now. “Please just…listen to me. Okay? She came over to my trailer and she brought rye to celebrate.” She rolls her eyes, scoffs. “And so we did. I had too many drinks and then we left to go join the party in Julian’s trailer, the goodbye party for me. I could barely stand. I thought I should call you. I remember even saying your name out loud and then the next thing I knew she was kissing me. And yes, I kissed her back for a second, that second you see captured on film. And then I realized what was happening. I broke it off. I pushed her back. I told her no. It pissed her off. But I told her no, that I love you and I can’t, and I left. I called a cab and got in that cab alone. And then I wake up here to this…this fucking bullshit!”
“Don’t start yelling at me!”
“I’m not yelling at you, I’m yelling because it’s bullshit! Of course there was some fucking vulture hiding around the corner, of course there’s someone fucking blackmailing me right now. Blackmailing us.”
“Oh they aren’t blackmailing me,” she says. “This is your problem now. Whatever we had, it’s over. Fuck the contract, I don’t want your fucking money and fuck your reputation too. You obviously reap what you sow.”
I wish what she was saying wasn’t flying into my chest like shrapnel, but it is. It fucking is.
“No,” I tell her, but fuck it’s hard to speak. This can’t be happening. “No. You have to understand. Everything I said is true.”
“But the pictures say otherwise.”
“The pictures lie!” I yell. “It’s all a lie. You have to believe me.” I press my hand into my chest. “Me, Alyssa. We’ve been together in this crazy world of real and fake for so long now, I get that it’s confusing, I get that you don’t know what to believe, I get that you might think it’s an act. I’m not blaming you for thinking the worst.”
“What? Thinking the worst?!” she cries, throwing out her arms. “Again, Emmett, the pictures. Your words. You kissed her. You were drunk and thought it was me. That doesn’t make it okay. Not even a bit.”