"You wanna sit in the back with Aspen?" I lean over and whisper in her ear.
She gives me a huge smile and kisses me. "Yeah, Thanks."
I can't help but wonder what I did to deserve it.
***
"Girls!" Sebastian sings the lyrics to one of his favorite songs.
"Dude, what's White Castle?" Sebastian breaks off our rapping and lets the Beastie Boys continue.
"I think it's like a hamburger place? I don't know."
"Oh my God! Do you guys listen to anything but the Beastie Boys?" Aspen yells from the back seat.
At the same time we answer by singing about girls again.
Priscilla smacks me upside the head.
Aspen puts a knee in the back of Sebastian's seat and all we can do is laugh.
"You're way too young to like them that much." Priscilla rolls her eyes.
"I'm going to pretend you didn't say that."
Sebastian leans forward and presses a button on the CD player to play it again.
My laughter takes me over as Priscilla says from the backseat, "They're not allowed to sit up front together anymore."
The cool part is she sounds just as happy as me.
***
I don't know what makes me do it, but I try to call Mom when we're almost to New York. No one answers. Which shouldn't be a big deal, but for some reason, my gut sinks.
***
I've never seen anything like New York.
Nothing.
I've been to big cities. We just left Chicago, but we all lean forward in our seats as we get into the city. Lights, buildings, people.
"I can't wait to walk around Greenwich Village. I want to hear poetry and drink coffee." Aspen sounds in awe.
"I want to go see a Broadway Play," Priscilla adds. She likes plays, I realize. The one in Chicago, here, and she even dragged us to a couple at our high school.
"I so want to hit Times Square." This from Sebastian.
I'm actually not sure what I want to see or do. Even though I always planned to come out here with them, I wonder if I ever believed it would really happen? If I ever thought I would get a chance to see any of it?
"What about you, Jay? What do you want to do?" Priscilla says into my ear.
"I think I want to do it all."
***
Our first night in New York we head to a hotel. Priscilla is supposed to call the realtor tomorrow so they can meet and get the keys to their apartment. We're all tired, but we're in freaking New York City so there's no way we're staying in tonight.
And since it's a weekend in New York, what better place to hit than Times Square?
Priscilla is in the shower and I just got out a few minutes ago. I have on a pair of blue jeans, my black studded belt, and white t-shirt. As I'm pulling on the white short-sleeve button up to go over it, I hear the blow dryer in the bathroom.
Pulling out my cell, I dial home. It rings a million times and no one answers. Next, I try her cell, but get the voicemail and leave her a message.
Nausea eats at my insides, but I try to ignore it. There's no reason for me to worry. They're probably off doing whatever it is they do. Having fun. Being happy. It's not as if she ever worried how anything affected me before, so why should I stress about her?
The blow dryer turns off and Priscilla steps out of the bathroom.
My mouth immediately goes dry as I take her in. It's nothing different than she would usually wear. A pair of tight jeans. A shirt that dips down in the front and has some tie thing below her br**sts, but somehow it's different. Maybe just because we're different.
"Speechless?" She winks at me.
"Absolutely," I reply and then step toward her. I pull her into my arms and kiss her head. "You're gorgeous."
"You don't clean up so bad yourself."
When we pull away, I shove the cell back in my pocket.
"What were you doing?" she asks.
I'm about to tell her nothing. The words almost come out of my mouth without even thinking about it, but it doesn't feel right. Yeah, I'm totally turning over a new leaf or something.
"I tried to call my mom. She didn't answer. Didn't answer earlier either."
"Are you worried?" She hugs me.
I answer as truthfully as I can, "I don't know." I kiss her again.
"I'm sure everything's fine. I mean...he's never done anything, right? I mean—"
I tense. "I know what you mean. No. I wouldn't have left if he ever hit her or called her names or anything." Though that's not really true, is it? He started calling her names at the end. He'd called her a lot of names when he told me he wasn't my dad. No. I'm trippin' out. Overreacting. "I'm sure everything's fine." Her words come out of my mouth his time.
"We'll keep trying. I'll call, too."
"Thanks." I lean forward and take her mouth because it's the only thing I can think to do.
When we come up for air, she's biting her lip. Her eyes looking anywhere except on me. "Listen... I know you didn't want to talk about it last night, but I think we should. Or you should think about going to see your dad. You can probably get a lot of closure if—"
"No." I shake my head. The thought of seeing him gives me a lump in my throat. Makes a fist squeeze the breath out of me. "I can't. I know it's stupid, but I just can't."
Priscilla grabs onto me when I try to pull away. "It's not stupid, Jaden. It's a big deal. I get it."
Man this girl is awesome. I still don't get it. Why she chose me. Why she'd want me, but I'm stoked that she does. "Thanks." I let her hair slide through my fingers.
"For what?" she asks, confusion in her voice.
"For you." I'm sure it sounds stupid, but it's true. The glow in her eyes makes me wonder if maybe, just maybe, it wasn't stupid. If for once, it might have been perfect.
"Come on." My fingers weave together with hers. "Let's be the ones to knock on their door this time."
With that we head out to get our friends.
***
Times Square is freaking incredible. I've never seen anything like it. Even Sebastian is speechless which says a lot because he has a big mouth and always has something to say.
I don't even know what it is about the place. I mean, there's stores there, but there are stores everywhere. Pubs and bars we'd all do anything to get into. Museums and theaters Priscilla can't keep her eyes off. I can't get my eyes off her.
Sebastian's hands latched with Aspen's and mine with Priscilla as we practically spin in a circle trying to take it all in.
This is going to sound totally lame, but I suddenly feel small. Not in a bad way, but in a normal way. Like I'm just this person like everyone else and my problems feel so much smaller.
For the first time, I wonder if I might really be able to lose all my issues here. If I can make them get lost in the sea of people and lights and activity. If Priscilla can help me make them go away.
Like I said... Lame, right?
"This is so kickass," Sebastian finally finds his voice.
"For sure," I add.
We go into a music store and embarrass the girls by singing to them. Priscilla's brown skin highlights pink and it's seriously hot. When Sebastian breaks into a dance it's too much even for me. "Now you're embarrassing yourself. You can't dance for shit."
"You're just jealous of my mad skills."
The words are hardly out of his mouth before I pull him into a headlock.
"You guys are so embarrassing!" Aspen says before ducking down another row. Priscilla is right behind her.
"Aspen! Priscilla! Wait for us!" I tease loudly. A few people are looking at us and they're trying to get away.
By the time we stumble toward the door, we're getting way too many dirty looks from people and decide to make our way out. The four of us are laughing like crazy as we spill onto the street.
Next we have ice cream. Priscilla takes forever to choose and finally I slip my arms around her waist from behind I say, "What's taking you so long? We know you're going to get strawberry like you always do."
Her Spanish accent is heavy when she says, "And you're just going to get chocolate right?"
I smile even though it's the most cheeseball thing in the world to be happy about, but then I realize she won't care. Hell, she'll probably like it too, so I lean forward, my mouth right next to her ear. "Check us out. We're one of those couples who can order each other's ice cream and finish each other's sentence. We're the shit."
I'm rewarded for my killer sweetness by her turning enough to press her lips to mine.
"All right, enough of that, you two. There are children present." Sebastian tries to pull us apart.
"Quit messing with my game." I push him.
"Remember when I got with Aspen last year and you guys gave us so much shit?" He looks back and forth between the two of us. "Well, payback is a bitch."
We ignore him. I press a kiss to Pris' neck just to show him up.
We eat our ice cream and walk around some more. Really, it's just cool to be here. Cool to be here with them. A couple hours later as we're hailing a cab to go back to our room, I realize this is the only place I should be. Actually it doesn't even have to by New York. It can be anywhere. I just need the people who are here with me right now.
Everything is perfect and I'm starting to believe it might really stay that way.
Chapter Seventeen
We're at breakfast the next morning when my phone rings. Everything inside me turns to ice. I don't know why. It's just my cell phone. It might be anyone, a wrong number or whatever, but for some reason, I have the sudden urge to puke.
My hands fumble with the phone and I see "Mom" light up on the screen. I have to swallow the bile in my throat as I push out of the chair and put the phone to my ear.
"What's wrong?" I ask. The words make me feel like crap because there shouldn't be something wrong because she's calling me. She's my mom and she's supposed to want to talk to me.