“Good night Selena,” he kissed my cheek and I almost melted into the carpet. “I’m sure you’ll feel better in the afternoon.”
“You’re really not going to stay?” I put on my best drunken seductive look and bit my lip. “Are you scared you won’t measure up or something?”
“Measure up?” he raised his eyebrow.
“Yeah. I said it. Measure. Up.”
“Selena Ross,” he sighed, “you’ve told me on two separate occasions that you would like to take things slow…Since I’m not a fan of drunken sex, or sex with a woman I’d really like to know better first, I’m more than happy to honor that. But if we ever do get the chance to have sex, I’m one hundred percent sure you’ll feel that one thing I’ve never worried about is measuring up.”
My cheeks were on fire. I couldn’t get any more words to come out of my mouth.
“You should get some sleep. Call me whenever you want to reschedule our date…If you still want to,” he kissed my forehead and walked away.
Chapter 16
Ethan
I did the right thing…I should not have stayed with her last night…I should not have stayed with her last night…
“This is the last date I’m going on without my checklist, Barry,” I answered as soon as he called my phone.
“What? Why?”
“Why?” I scoffed. “There’s a reason why people have standards for who they date. Have you ever thought about that?”
“Yeah, reasonable standards—not ‘she must read these particular books and not watch these types of movies’ standards. Every woman isn’t going to be a perfect match, Ethan. Just roll with it. By the way, could you send us two more sour cream apple pies from Sweet Seasons? The chef team thinks they’ve perfected it, but the board wants to be completely sure before we send out the official recipe to all the stores. Oh, and we need like five more cherry bourbon ones, that pie is giving us some problems.”
“You got it. I’ll ship some tomorrow morning. Call you later,” I hung up.
I was thirty minutes early for my brunch date at a winery and I was dreading meeting another weird woman, even though she “seemed” normal a couple days ago. In fact, I’d wanted to call and cancel earlier, but I decided against it.
The only woman I really wanted to date was Selena Ross, and as much as I hated not knowing if she would ever agree to see me, there was a part of me that enjoyed the uncertainty.
Sure, she seemed a bit high-strung, and she should probably never sing publicly again, but for whatever reason, I found her quite charming.
I checked my phone all day, hoping to see a text or a call from her, hoping that she would finally give me a chance.
“Good afternoon Ethan,” a pretty blonde woman tapped my shoulder.
“Good afternoon Sandy,” I stood up and pulled out her chair.
Before I could ask her anything, a wine connoisseur came over to our table with several glasses of wine. He explained the different flavors and fermenting processes and encouraged us to take a tour of the vineyard that was out back.
“This is a whole lot of wine,” Sandy blushed. “I didn’t know you were going to buy the five thousand dollar package. I would’ve contributed…”
“Don’t worry about it. I would’ve never let you pay,” I went down my list of small talk questions for the next hour—I was actually getting better at it.
I found out that she was normal, completely normal. She was a part-time schoolteacher, a classics book collector, and a fan of contemporary rock music.
I couldn’t tell her my real occupation, but I did tell her that I loved sports, coffee, and books. We even argued over the best British novels. She swore by Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, I swore by George Orwell’s 1984.
As the connoisseur brought over another tray of wine, I debated on whether or not I wanted to ask her out again. I didn’t know if Selena would call me by the end of the weekend, and there was an indie rock concert on Saturday that I was sure Sandy would enjoy.
I took a sip of vintage red wine and decided to go for it. “Sandy, today was great. I really enjoyed spending time with you. Would you like to—”
“You look like you have nice toes.”
“Umm okay. Thanks? Anyway, I was about to ask if—”
“I like to lick toes.”
I dropped my glass to the floor. “Excuse me? What did you say?”
“I. Like. To. Lick. Toes.”
I looked around for the waiter. I needed the check. Now.
“You wear a size thirteen don’t you?” she licked her lips. “I can guess any man’s shoe size within ten seconds. Thirteen is a good size.”
“I need to go to the restroom for a minute. Will you please excuse me, Sandy?”
“Did you know that the toes are some of the most sensitive areas of the body?” she dropped down to the floor and began to untie my shoes. “I can distract your body’s urine glands with a few strategic licks.”
“No, that’s okay,” I moved my foot away from her and signaled for the check. “My feet were already licked today. Thank you for your offer though…I appreciate that.”
She jumped up and hugged me. “You lick your own toes too? I didn’t think I’d ever find someone like me!”
Chapter 17
Selena
I woke up around four in the afternoon, with a mind-numbing headache and an itchy dry throat. Even though it was hours past my drunken escapade, I could still taste the sour tang of vodka on my lips.