He smiles.
I start in on my beer label again.
“So…” he says.
“So…”
“I guess I should explain about earlier, what happened in the coffee shop.”
“Only if you want to.”
He gives a tight-lipped smile. “You remember I told you I used to gamble?”
I nod.
His eyes lower. “After my mom had died, I went off the rails. I’d always liked to play cards … but this went further. I was playing, gambling way more than I ever had. I was winning for a while, then the losing streak kicked in. I kept trying to make back what I lost, but before I knew it, I’d run up a massive debt that I had no way of paying back.”
“You owed the money to Donnie?”
He laughs a humorless sound. “No, Donnie’s just the hired monkey. I owed money to the guy he works for – Max. I used to regular a few places in Farmington to play, then I got involved in a poker ring that Max ran. There’s not much in the way here for card players like me. Like I was,” he corrects. “But over in Farmington … there’s plenty for a seasoned player.” He leans close, elbows on the table as he scrubs his hands over his face.
He folds his arms on the table, looking down. “I’m just real sorry that you got pulled in it back there, Mia.”
That’s why he didn’t want me to tell Donnie my name. He didn’t want those horrible people knowing who I am. He was trying to protect me.
Something about that touches me.
“It doesn’t matter. I’m just glad you’re okay now.” I put my beer down. “Do you still owe the money? Is that why he was trying to pick a fight with you?”
If he does, I’ll pay his debt. It’s not like I can’t afford it. He’s been so good to me, helping me with the Anna stuff, and I can finally do something good with Oliver’s money. Helping Jordan would count as something good to me.
“No, my debt was paid.” He scrubs his hand over his face again. “My dad. He used the money from my mom’s life insurance.”
Oh. Right.
Now I know where his guilt comes from.
I try to conjure up something worthy to say, something to make him feel better, but I come up with nothing. So I say the only thing I can, “I’m so sorry, Jordan.”
He takes a long drink of his beer. Drying off his mouth with the back of his hand, he shakes his head. “Don’t feel bad for me. I don’t deserve your kindness.” His eyes close on a long blink. “Do you remember I told you that my dad used to be a cop?”
I nod and take a drink of beer.
“Before the debt was paid, before my dad knew about any of it, the gambling and how deep in I was, I was out one night in town. Not in this bar,” he adds like that would have some bearing on his story. “I was out drinking with some buddies of mine, and later on in the night I was … uh, leaving the bar with … a girl.” He scratches his cheek, looking uncomfortable.
I ignore the unpleasant twist in my stomach brought on by the knowledge of Jordan leaving a bar with a girl he more than likely wanted to have sex with.
“We were headed to get a cab, when I was jumped by Donnie and a couple of his guys. It was meant to a warning beating because I hadn’t paid up, but I made the mistake of fighting back, instead of just taking it – I’m not one to take a beating.” He shrugs. “And I … mid-fight, to antagonize him … kind of told Donnie that I’d had sex with his girlfriend.”
“Had you?”
“Yes.”
Stomach twist. “Oh.”
“It was a one-time thing. A mistake.” He sighs. “But after telling him … well, that was when Donnie pulled out a baseball bat.”
“Dear god.” I wince, closing my eyes, feeling his pain as if was my own. I know how bad beatings can be. Especially when a weapon is involved.
“Anyway.” He drags his hand through his hair. “The girl ran back to the bar while it was happening, got my friends out to help me, called the cops…”
I see the rest in his eyes. “Your dad?”
“Yeah. He lost his shit when he saw the state they had left me in. The bastards had f**ked off the second they heard sirens, but my dad didn’t let up. He eventually found Donnie a couple of blocks over, and…” He lets out a long sigh. “…he beat the shit out of Donnie—who was unarmed by this point. He’d dropped the bat running. My dad hurt him. Really hurt him. Left him in a bad way.”
Jordan’s eyes search out mine. “You gotta understand, Mia … my dad … he’s not violent by nature. It’s just not who is. He’s a great guy – really great. The best. And he deserves a kid better than me. It was just … well, Mom hadn’t long since passed, and I’m his only child. I guess he just lost it when he saw me.”
I nod, letting him know I understand. I only wish I’d had a dad as caring and protective as Jordan’s.
“Dad was suspended pending investigation.” He leans back in his chair and rubs his eye. “After the investigation, he was found guilty and stripped of his badge and gun. He can’t ever work in law enforcement again – courtesy of my f**k-up.” He lifts his bottle in mock-cheers, then presses it to his lips and tips his head back.
“Did anything happen to Donnie for what he did to you?”
Jordan lets out a hollow laugh. “He got a twelve month suspended sentence.”