“So—no flies in the ointment?” Sarika sounds teasing, but I can tell she seriously wants to know. “No clouds on the horizon?”
“None,” I say, trying not to sound smug. “All blue sky.”
“Amazing,” says Sarika, looking unconvinced. “Do you agree, Matt?”
“Hundred percent,” says Matt at once, and I feel a surge of love for him. “We have so much in common, Ava and I. We both love…” He pauses as though searching for words. “We both really enjoy…” He stops again, apparently stumped.
I feel a slight tweak of annoyance, because can’t he think of one thing we both like? There are so many! There’s sex…and there’s…
“Tai chi!” I suddenly recall. “We do tai chi together every day.”
“Yes.” Matt’s brow clears. “Tai chi. That was Ava’s idea,” he adds. “She has great ideas. Always coming up with plans.”
“You have great ideas too,” I counter at once, but he shakes his head.
“I’m not as creative as you. I was a lucky guy, meeting Ava,” he concludes stoutly. “Best day of my life.” At this, Sarika’s face melts into a misty smile. (For all her talk, she’s secretly a bit of a romantic.)
“That’s so lovely. How did you hurt your head, by the way?” she adds, looking at the Band-Aid on Matt’s forehead.
“Oh.” Matt smiles ruefully and raises a hand to touch it. “Pile of stuff fell on me at Ava’s flat. It’s pretty crowded in there, and there’s shit all over the place. I bumped into a dresser and a load of painting palettes and brushes fell on me.”
“It was only a small cut,” I say defensively, and Matt nods.
“At least I didn’t end up in A&E this time,” he says, and both Sarika and Nell goggle at him.
“A&E?” echoes Nell.
“Oh, didn’t I mention that?” I say evasively. “Matt had a tiny accident the first time he came to mine.”
“I sat on Ava’s ‘rescue chair’ and it collapsed,” explains Matt, and Nell snorts, then claps a hand over her mouth.
“Sorry,” she says. “Matt, have a drink. So, big question,” she adds as she pours him a cava. “Do you get on with Harold?”
There’s a long pause. I can see both Sarika and Nell waiting for Matt’s answer.
“Harold’s a character,” says Matt. “Definitely a character.”
“Do you have a dog?” asks Sarika.
“No, but my family keeps dogs.” He pauses again. “Although, you know, we train them pretty thoroughly. So. Bit different.”
I can see both Nell’s and Sarika’s eyes widening.
“Harold’s trained!” I say defensively. “He sits, he stays…sometimes….”
“Harold’s trained?” Matt echoes with a laugh. “Are you kidding? I mean properly trained. If you saw my family’s dogs, you’d understand.”
“What are they trained to do?” demands Nell suspiciously, and I want to hug her for leaping to my side. “Jump through hoops?”
“Be civilized companions for their owners,” says Matt easily, and I feel a tiny stab of annoyance, because he knows I don’t like the word “owner.”
“I think it’s about communication, not training,” I say, trying to stay lighthearted. “And I’m not Harold’s owner, I’m his friend.” I reach down to ruffle Harold’s head but, slightly annoyingly, he’s gone over to Matt.
“He could do with some training,” says Matt, as though I haven’t spoken. “But he’s a great guy, Harold. Aren’t you, boy?” He addresses Harold fondly. “I can’t believe I let you in the bed. Dogs should not sleep in beds.” He looks up at Sarika and Nell. “Anyway, yes, Harold and I have bonded. Mostly because we’re the two meat-eaters in the house,” he adds cheerfully, at which Sarika’s jaw drops open.
“You’re a meat-eater?” She swivels to me. “Ava, you told us you’d found a vegetarian artisan carpenter!”
“Called Jean-Luc,” adds Nell with a wicked grin.
“The Jean-Luc thing was a misunderstanding,” I say, ruffled. “Anyone can have a misunderstanding.”
“And I’m a meat-eating capitalist,” says Matt robustly. “Sorry about that,” he adds, sounding not at all apologetic.
“But you’re on the way to becoming vegetarian,” I say, still trying to sound lighthearted. “You’re considering it, at least.”
“Nope.” Matt shakes his head, and I feel a surge of indignation, which I try to quell. How can he be so closed-minded? Didn’t he hear anything I told him about the planet?
I’m suddenly aware that Nell and Sarika are scrutinizing me, and I hastily plaster on my loved-up euphoric smile.
“Anyway,” I say quickly, “it’s no big deal.”
“No big deal?” Nell peers at me, staggered. “Meat is no big deal to you?”
“No,” I say defensively. “It’s not. We’re in love.” I clutch Matt again. “The details are just details.”
“Right,” says Nell, looking skeptical. “Well, cheers to that.” We clink glasses, then I say, “Maud will be here in a moment. I’ll just assemble my vegetable mini-wraps.”
“Need a hand?” says Matt at once, and I can’t help shooting a triumphant look at the others as though to say, “See how helpful he is?”
“Don’t worry,” I say affectionately. “You chat with Sarika and Nell. I won’t be a minute.”
I spread out my picnic blanket next to Nell’s, take out my Tupperware containers, and start constructing my little wraps with vegetable strips and spicy sauce. I can hear Matt and my friends talking, but I’m concentrating so hard, I barely catch a word, until Sarika exclaims, “Golf!” in such a high-pitched, incredulous tone that half the park must hear her.
Oh shit. How did they get onto that? Now she’ll say she can’t believe I’m dating someone who’s into golf and make that a big thing. I should have told Matt not to refer to the golf. I could have said, really casually, “By the way, let’s never mention that you play golf.”
Then I catch myself. No. Don’t be ridiculous. I don’t want to lie to my friends. Obviously. But it’s quite annoying, them being so forensic and knowing so much about me.
As I finish the wraps and stand up, shaking my legs out, Nell’s voice travels through the air: “No, Ava never mentioned any art.”
“She described your flat,” chimes in Sarika. “It sounds wonderful. But she never mentioned the art.”
“For real?” Matt replies, sounding astonished. “Well, I’m quite a serious collector. One artist in particular. He’s a genius. I have his pieces everywhere.”
“Which artist?” demands Nell, and Matt says, “Arlo Halsan.”
Instantly, Nell and Sarika whip out their phones. I just know they’re going to google Arlo Halsan, and I feel a sudden dread. Why did they have to bring up art?
“Ava!” says Nell chidingly as she sees me standing up. “You never told us about Matt’s art collection! Is it amazing?”
“Oh! Yes!” I force myself to sound enthused as I walk over. “It’s incredible.”
“Which is your favorite piece, Ava?” Matt turns to me eagerly. “I’ve never even asked you.”
I stare at him, frozen.
“It’s…hard to decide,” I say at last. “They’re all so…”
“Oh my God,” says Sarika, blinking in shock as her phone loads with images of the hairless wolf and disturbing sculptures of eyeless faces. “Wow.” She looks up at me, her mouth twitching, and I stare desperately back at her. “ ‘Incredible’ is the word.”
“Jesus!” Nell recoils from her phone as the same images appear. “Very…” She searches for a word. “Distinctive.”
“Search ‘Raven Three,’ ” suggests Matt eagerly. “I have that piece in my hall. I got it at auction. Cost a lot, but…wait till you see it.”
There’s silence as Sarika and Nell both google it, then Sarika makes a muffled, exploding noise, which she hastily turns into a cough. Nell gazes at the screen, apparently speechless, then looks up and says in heartfelt tones, “I don’t even know how to respond.”
“I know, right?” says Matt, his eyes lit with enthusiasm.
“Are those human teeth inside that beak?” Sarika is peering at the image, looking freaked out.
“What do you think of it, Ava?” says Nell brightly, and I silently curse her.
“Well.” I rub my nose, playing for time. “I love art. So.”
Sarika gives another suppressed snort and Nell bites her lip. Then she seems to have an idea.
“Hey, Matt, I was going to bring crisps for the kids, but I forgot. Would you mind getting some? There’s a kiosk by the gates.”
“Sure,” says Matt easily, batting away the fiver she offers him. “Back in a moment.”
He saunters off, and the others watch him before swiveling to me.
“Golf?” says Sarika in a hysterical undertone. “Golf? Does Matt know your views on golf, Ava?”
“He clearly has no idea about your taste in art,” says Nell with a gurgle of laughter. “Or are you saying you like this freaky stuff?”
“Stop it,” I say crossly. “It’s irrelevant.”
“Don’t you think you need to be a little bit honest with him?” Sarika looks suddenly earnest. And I know she means well, but I’m not in the mood for a lecture about relationships.
“No!” I say. “I mean, I am!” I give a huge yawn before I can stop myself, and Nell peers at me.