Just saying all of that bullshit made me hate myself. It wasn’t true. Bliss had beat a disease that took lives daily. If she wanted out of this damn town she’d get out. She’d create herself. She would achieve any goal she set for herself. She would fight until she had it. I believed that.
Octavia nodded. “Good. I’m glad you agree.” She then let out a laugh. “The idea of her ever fitting into your world is ludicrous anyway. I guess I was tired last night. Being too sensitive. I should have known you weren’t interested in someone like her. I’ve never known you to settle for someone so beneath you.”
Bliss York
“BLISS ISN’T LIKE us . . . She’s a farm girl from Alabama with an inferior education and very little sense of the real world. She lives in a bubble here in Sea Breeze. One she won’t ever get out of or hope to break free from . . .”
Those words ran through my head over and over again. Long after I had walked away from Octavia’s office door. I’d needed to confirm a price on sandals she had ordered. That was it. Nothing more.
Yet . . . I’d been crushed instead. A pair of the sandals were still in my hand as I stood in the store front and stared blankly out the window. Farm girl from Alabama. I winced and closed my eyes tightly wishing I could erase that. If only I had waited a few more minutes before walking back there. I’d still be living in my happy bubble where Nate had watched me all evening and my heart had soared with hope.
This was my punishment. I shouldn’t have wanted him to watch me. To look at me. Because he wasn’t free. I had wanted to take Octavia’s fiancé away. That was wrong. This was what I deserved. The pain of knowing Nate’s real feelings about me.
He wasn’t the same boy from that summer. He was grown and he had changed. More so than me. I was stronger. Less naïve. The real world and its horror had touched me briefly. But the pain of heartbreak was new. I preferred not knowing how this felt.
I had been sheltered from so much. How the world saw me was one of those things I didn’t really know. Until now. I liked to think I was on the road to making a real life for myself. That my beating leukemia had made me strong. I wasn’t easily beaten down and I had goals. A lot of goals. When people saw me I hoped they also saw all of that.
Apparently, they didn’t. I was a farm girl, with an inferior education and no sense of the real world. It was a slap in the face and a knife to the chest. If only these damn shoes had a price on them I could still be in a happy place.
“Oh good you’re here. We need to add something to the window. A flash. A touch of what the others don’t have. White twinkle lights or the feel of Manhattan. Give the shoppers a taste of what they’re getting when they walk through those doors. Draw them in. The clothing isn’t enough.”
I still had a job to do. More so than before I had something to prove too. This farm girl from Alabama could impress them. I wasn’t an idiot. The pressure to do so however made me somewhat nervous. What if I gave her ideas and he shot them down? What if my ideas were simple? Just like Nate said I was.
“Don’t get me wrong. You’ve done a beautiful job displaying the best of what we offer. Kudos to you for that. Now we need to take it a step further. Give them what they don’t get when they look in the other windows. Show them why this store stands out. Why they can’t walk past it. Why they must buy something from Octavia’s.”
Nate had walked in while she was going on about making the window stand out. Ignoring him before had been difficult. But now . . . it was easier. I had something to prove but not to him. I had to prove it to myself. Remind myself I wasn’t what he said I was. That all he saw was what he assumed. There was more to me than that and he’d never get the privilege of knowing. Our past was now firmly that. The door was closed. Memories shoved so far back it would take a shovel and days of work to dig them out. I was done with all there was to do with Nate Finlay.
I had to show Bliss York that she was strong, smart, and capable of reaching her goals. All of them and more. Nate’s presence faded to the background and I turned my complete and full attention to the window display. My focus was centered on that and only that.
One thing they didn’t know about a girl from Alabama was when we were backed into a corner we came out with both fists up and a will to win.
“I like the twinkle lights. This is a coastal town and people shopping here will be looking for something that reminds them they’re enjoying the sand, surf, and sun. The twinkle lights can be the sunlight, let’s bring in sand for the floor but then the sea breeze can’t be seen. We need something that draws the eye. White feathers suspended as if flying free in the wind surrounding the display would be unique and attention grabbing.”
I wasn’t sure where the idea came from. I just opened my mouth and let the ideas fly. Not caring how ridiculous it may sound. The picture began taking shape in my head and I added to it and didn’t stop talking for Octavia to say anything until I had it all outlined. Shown her where it all would go and then explained why it would sell. One would think I’d worked at retail stores my entire life the way I was blabbing on about what the shoppers wanted.
When I was finally done, I waited for her reaction. Prepared for the worst but knowing I hadn’t backed down due to fear or the fact Nate had given me a major blow to my self-esteem only minutes before.
“It’s brilliant,” were the words out of her mouth. I let out the breath I had been holding. I agreed with her. I wasn’t sure how I created it so quickly and relayed it so clearly but I had. And I was thankful I had. This had been a moment I needed to show myself, not them, that I could do this.