Beeindruckend, impressionnant, impresionante, fantastico! x
Elliot, in English please xx
Awesome. It all means awesome, Pen. You might need that for a few of the stops you’re going to make. PS The Fernsehturm is a television tower and the tallest structure in Germany at 368m tall. If I wasn’t enjoying an extravagant lunch at Browns courtesy of Alex right now I would be smashing my head on the table. Didn’t you research some of the places you were going before you left? I do love you, Penny, but you need to broaden your knowledge of epic-ness. That’s the first thing I’m doing with you when you get back. Let me know how it goes. My first day at the internship is tomorrow. WISH ME LUCK. All the love, your favourite gay x
I smile down at my phone and go to reply when Blake takes it out of my hand and places it on the table in front of us.
“How am I supposed to beat you if you’re not even playing? Put that away.”
“Rude!” I say, picking it back up and putting it in my pocket.
“It’s not rude. That’s just how you’ve chosen to feel.” He smiles and hands the controller back to me.
Noah stands up and stretches, throwing his arms high above his head and yawning dramatically. “I’m beat after last night and the early start. I’m gonna grab a quick nap in the back. Penny, is that cool?”
“Of course,” I say. Even as I say the words, I stare up at Noah, trying to communicate Please don’t leave me alone with your creepy friend with my eyes, but he isn’t as good at decoding my secret messages as Elliot is. He just smiles and heads into the back of the bus.
In an attempt to enjoy the next half an hour, I ask Blake a few questions about the tour, Noah, the drums . . . anything I can think of. His answers consist mostly of grunts and mumbles, but altogether it about amounts to a conversation. It’s not overly stimulating and not very enjoyable, but it makes the journey go a little faster and, since he’s not concentrating so hard on racing, I actually manage to beat him a few times (much to his horror).
“So, you’ve been with Noah how long now?” he asks.
“Oh . . . a bit over six months? It’s gone so quickly.”
“Yeah, that sounds like a lifetime! You know, this tour is a big thing for Noah. It’s his dream come true.”
Even though I’m not sure how to take the “lifetime” comment, I’m shocked that we are actually having a nice conversation. It worked! I softened Blake the grump. Playing car games was totally worth it to realize I had the wrong impression of him and he just needed to wind down. I’d always hoped I’d get on well with Noah’s friends and finally it’s happening.
I smile. “I know. I kind of wish I’d known him before he achieved his dream. I bet he never thought it would take off how it has. His music is amazing, though. He’s a great songwriter. I mean, I don’t know a lot about songwriting or the music industry but—”
“See, that’s the thing, Penny,” Blake interrupts. “You don’t know anything about the music industry at all.” His tone changes. My throat feels suddenly tight and my face starts getting hot. Blake is still looking at the screen and racing his car round the track. “I’m sure you’re great, Penny. Noah obviously thinks so. I’m just not sure he thought about the consequences of having a girlfriend as his career kicks off.”
He puts down his controller and pulls out a packet of tobacco, then puts a filter in his mouth as he rolls a cigarette. I watch him and feel the horror of what he’s just said creep over me like a rash. I stay silent, waiting for him to say something, anything that would redeem him and this conversation.
“The tour’s going to be fun, though. Nights out in different cities, getting drunk, lots of girls,” he says through pursed lips as he continues to roll the cigarette.
“I’m not sure what you’re trying to say, Blake.” I stare at him out of the corner of my eye, but try to remain cool.
“ ‘Blake’ sounds funny when English chicks say it.” He puts the newly rolled cigarette behind his ear and gets up from the sofa to grab another beer from the mini fridge. When he sits back down, he’s so close his leg brushes against mine. “I’m just saying . . . in the dream of being on tour, there’s one thing on this bus that none of us ever wanted.”
I’m stunned into silence. I want to come up with something witty to say, but my whole mouth feels numb, like it’s been frozen solid. Mark, the bassist, comes over and picks up the controller from where it’s dropped out of my hands. “Mind if I take over?”
“Go for it,” I manage to say. I get up and walk towards the back of the bus. At the last moment before I enter the area with the beds I look back over my shoulder at Blake. He’s engrossed in the screen.
I put my hand on the door frame to steady myself. It’s only now that I notice how much I’m shaking, but it starts to pass, and I smile as I remember that there is a cure very nearby.
Chapter Fourteen
Noah rolls over and blinks his eyes at the light as I come in through the curtains.
“Hey, my girl.”
“Oh, hey. Did I wake you?” I sit down on the edge of his bunk.
“Nah, couldn’t sleep after all. It’s all too exciting.”
I nod, biting my lip. He sits up and covers my hand with his. “Are you OK? You look a bit pale.”
I shake my head. “Well . . .” I want to tell him about what Blake said, but I also want Noah to think I can get on with his friends. I’m also hyperaware that Blake is his best friend, and I don’t want to force him to have to choose sides between us. “How far back do you and Blake go?”