“Call a girl,” I snapped, walking past her.
I felt warm fingers on my arm, and before I could jerk away, I was rendered completely paralyzed by her tender grasp. Shaking, I swallowed the terror and gave her a pointed look.
Her face fell, but she didn’t remove her hand. “I just… I heard they wear uniforms at Elite, and I just don’t want to look stupid. I only have a few choices… I mean it’s not a big deal, I just…”
Well, damn me to Hell. I sighed and hung my head. “Fine.” I’d just try to ignore the way that the clothes hugged her body, and then when she was done twirling in front of me, I’d go puke in the bathroom and run ten miles to get the image out of my head. Sounded like the time of my life. Bring it on. After all, I deserved that type of torture, didn’t I?
“Yay!” She clapped again then looped her arm in mine. “Thanks, Phoenix. I knew I could count on you.”
Funny she should say that. After all, I wasn’t that guy. The trustworthy one, the accountable one, the mature one. I might as well be a body without a soul. It’s what I felt like most days, and she did nothing but remind me that I’d once had it all and lost it.
“Hey...” Bee nudged me. “…you look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
“Every day in the mirror, Bee, every day.”
“What?” Her bright smile fell.
I forced my own. “Nothing. Let’s go pick out shoes.”
“Awesome!”
CHAPTER TWO
How much can she torture me? Let me count the ways.
Bee
HE HATED ME. I knew it. Everyone knew it. I tried everything I could to get him to open up — to smile. But it was like he’d forgotten how. When I asked Tex why Phoenix was so… cold and indifferent to me, my brother had laughed and said to be thankful.
Thankful? That the man was an ass? Thankful that my only friend couldn’t even look at me? And that was the pathetic part, wasn’t it? He was truly my only friend, my first friend. The first person who had stayed next to me when I’d cried myself to sleep. The first person who had threatened to kill someone on my behalf, and the first person to genuinely protect me with his life — with no regard for his own safety.
How was I supposed to get past that? How was I supposed to move on from Phoenix when he was literally the only familiar thing I had? The only one I truly knew.
Ever since moving to Chicago, things had been different. I was given freedom I’d never had before, but I couldn’t take it. I didn’t even know how to use it. Sure, I was given my own car, compliments of my mafia boss brother along with a credit card that I’m pretty sure had no limit. But money didn’t buy happiness — that much I knew.
I’d grown up with a cold-hearted father who’d wanted nothing to do with me.
And then been given to a cold-hearted uncle who’d leered at me every chance he’d gotten.
Both had been wealthy.
Both had been powerful.
Both were dead.
Just another gift from my long-lost brother.
“Bee?” Phoenix said from behind me. “You okay? You stopped walking up the stairs.”
“Yeah, well…” I kept my voice light. “I was hoping you’d run into me and accidentally cop a feel.”
Phoenix snorted. “Keep dreaming.”
“Every night,” I sang. But his words hurt. They hurt so bad, he had no idea how much. The sad part? I lived for his reactions — even when ninety-nine percent of them were negative, I still held out hope for that one percent. Maybe it was my innocence talking, maybe it was just the need to hold on to one tiny thread of hope that my life would be more than getting passed between family members. I was still waiting for the gauntlet to fall. For Tex to get rid of me, pass me off to another associate or worse, just forget I was his family.
The only constant in my life had been Phoenix De Lange.
And he wanted nothing to do with me.
I shivered, out of loneliness, rejection, then I lifted my chin. I was a Campisi; I was made of tougher stuff. I just wished I felt that way rather than acted that way.
“So…” I made my way into my room and pointed to the three outfits. “Which one for my first day at Eagle Elite?”
Phoenix moved from behind me and stood in front of my bed, his hands on his hips. From this viewpoint I could stare at him without looking like a complete lunatic. His stance was always rigid, like he was just waiting for someone to pull a gun on him or attack. Every muscle taut. My eyes roamed over his muscular back and tight black T-shirt. Muscles protruded everywhere. He wasn’t huge, but he wasn’t small by any means either. Around six foot two, he wasn’t the type of guy you’d mess with, especially with the way he always looked so pissed off. Dark circles almost always framed his eyes. His lips were pulled tight across straight white teeth that I never saw unless he smiled by accident — which was rare.
Phoenix sighed loudly, his dark head bobbing up and down once before he turned and stared straight through me, his dark blue eyes clouding over. “Does it really matter that much, Bee? The reason Elite has uniforms is to make you look like everyone else.”
I flinched. I didn’t want to look like everyone else — I wanted to look pretty, for him.
Phoenix swore under his breath and pinched his nose.
“Well, how about this one?” I stepped up next to him, my arm brushing his. He jerked away and clenched his jaw tightly.
“No.” He bit down on his lower lip, turning it white before he swore again. “Don’t wear the skirt.”