“So how are you? I feel like I haven't seen you in ...” Adele's voice trailed off as she realized how stupid that sounded.
“Forever?” Zoey laughed. “Just about. Sorry I haven't been around much this past month, I got promoted at work.”
“No worries. They told me you visited me a lot at the hospital. That you painted my nails,” Adele smiled.
“Yup. Once a week. And your toes. You owe me.”
“I do.”
“If I'm ever in a coma, I want Brazilians every two weeks.”
“No one can ever be that much in debt,” Adele burst out laughing.
“Please, I don't want a wolf-puss while I'm out. I saw the kinds of doctors and nurses you had strutting through your room. I want to look good,” Zoey insisted, sending Adele into another laughing jag.
“Well, I guess it's good to know I was surrounded by a bunch of hotties.”
They were silent for a while after that, both sipping at their drinks and looking around the crowded space. It was kind of sad, really. Adele and Zoey had always had good times together. She wished it could be like that again.
But that part of Adele was gone – it was at the bottom of a cliff somewhere, under a massive pile of roots and rock and rubble.
“I believe you, you know,” Zoey suddenly blurted out.
“Hmmm?” Adele hadn't been paying attention. Her brain was busy sorting through the ruins of her memories.
“I believe you when you say you were somewhere else. That place you talk about. I kept telling your brothers you were just away somewhere, and that you would come back when you were ready. They didn't believe me, either,” her friend assured her.
Adele stayed quiet for a long time. She wasn't sure how to respond. It made her feel better – having someone claim they believed her – but also made her feel worse, at the same time. It just confirmed that she had in fact been somewhere else, and now she couldn't go back.
Before her body could work up the necessary energy to cry, though, she saw a familiar face in the crowd. She groaned when it was followed by two others, and she watched as her brothers wandered over to her table.
“What are you doing here?” she demanded.
August ignored her, leaning over to shake hands with someone who recognized him from ESPN or CNN or whatever channel it was that covered his hockey team. River broke off and went around the table, saying hi to Zoey before stealing her beer. She laughed and slapped his wrist before playfully chewing him out. Only Ocean paid attention to his sister.
“Checking up on you,” he answered her. “Zoey told me you were coming out tonight. I think this is a bad idea.”
“I didn't ask for your opinion,” Adele snapped back.
“We're only looking out for you. We only want you to be safe,” he insisted.
“This isn't keeping me safe, Ocean. This is stalking me. I'm just gonna have a beer, then I'm gonna go home.”
“Have you been doing your physical therapy?”
“Yes, Dad.”
“Have you been seeing that shrink?”
“Psychiatrist, and yes. Twice a week,” she assured him.
“What does he think of all this attitude you've got now?” Ocean asked. Demanded. That's all he did anymore. Wanted a bullet-point rundown on everything she was doing, everywhere she was going. As if he was suddenly entitled to know everything that happened to her.
I go into a coma for four months and suddenly I owe the whole world something.
“He thinks I'm clinically depressed. He also thinks I suffer from delusions, post traumatic stress, and a couple other even scarier sounding afflictions. He has a mile long list of meds he wants to put me on, and I hope I get them soon, because then maybe I can just become a zombie and not have to deal with you anymore.”
Adele was suddenly very glad her other brothers weren't paying attention. River was sensitive – he hid it well, but he really was, and her words would've caused irreparable damaged. August was a hot head, he would've yelled right back at her and created a whole scene.
Ocean, easily the least deserving person of her anger, was also the best equipped to deal with it. He was strong, and he was smart, and he loved her more than just about anyone else on the planet. She watched him while she pulled her lips between her teeth, chewing on them to help stave off her tears.
“I'm sorry,” he finally sighed, and he slid around the table so his arm was pressed against hers. “I know ... I know we're too much. It's all too much for you. And I even tell myself to leave you alone. To give you space. But you see, when you spend four months thinking you might never see your best friend again, it's hard to let them out of your sight.”
The tears couldn't be stopped then. She sniffled and snorted and wiped at her face until he handed her a cocktail napkin. She laughed at the tiny size, which made him laugh. Ocean rarely laughed, which was a pity, because it was a beautiful sound. She mopped up her tears and leaned against him.
“I missed you,” she whispered.
“Not even half as much as I missed you, kiddo,” he whispered back.
“Let's not be this way,” she breathed. “Not tonight. Let's be old us, okay? And we can just talk to each other about anything and everything.”
“I'd like that.”
“But you have to go first,” she laughed. “I was gone for too long, I don't have anything to talk about.”
“Okay,” he chuckled and rubbed at the back of his neck. “So how's life back with Charlie?”
Ah. Of course he immediately went there.
“It's fine,” she said. “And he told me about how you tried to beat him up.”
“Snitch.”
“He wasn't cheating on me, Ocean.”
“Is that what he said? Because I saw him and that -”
“We'd broken up.”
He was silent for a moment.
“Come again?”
“The night of the crash – that's why we left the party early. We'd decided to break up. I was going to tell everyone about it in the morning, but ...” she let her voice trail off. She'd never seen that next morning.
“Do you actually remember that? Or did he tell you that?” Ocean checked. She rolled her eyes.
“I remember some of it, and I'd also texted Zoey about it after it happened. It's still in my phone.”
“Jesus, why didn't he say anything to us?” he growled.
“Oh, gee, I wonder ... maybe because he figured you'd think he was lying and would beat him up?” she guessed.
“I wouldn't have -”
“You literally tried to.”
She had him there.
“I still think he should've told us.”
“Maybe,” she shrugged. “But he was upset, too. And scared. And he knew things were already hard enough for mom and dad, he didn't want to stress them out anymore. He's a good guy, Ocean. Not the guy for me, but a good guy, nonetheless, and you should probably apologize.”
“Apologize?” he groaned. “C'mon – he let us all believe you two were still together, and then he made out with your friend while you were dying in a bed a couple feet away.”
“They were hugging in a parking lot, the way I heard it,” she corrected him. “And I honestly wouldn't even care if they'd been humping out there. We'd broken up and I'd been unconscious for four months. The fact that he didn't sleep with her at all, didn't even put a move on her while I was away, pretty much guarantees him sainthood. So next time you see him? Apologize.”
Ocean glared at the table top for a while, then snorted.
“You believe him when he says he didn't put any moves on her?” he asked.
“Yes, Ocean, I believe him.”
Another pause.
“What a pussy. I'm glad you dumped him.”
Adele burst out laughing, and for the first time in a long time, the tears in her eyes were from happiness. It had been a stupid joke. A bad joke. But it had come from her big brother and had been said just for the sake of being silly, so it touched her heart. She snickered and snorted and wiped at her eyes.
“Jesus, Ocean, I leave you alone for five minutes and you're already making her cry!” August's voice boomed across the bar. He elbowed their big brother out of the way and wrapped a protective arm around Adele.
“What!? That's why I didn't want to tell you where we were going. You're such a bossy ...” Zoey started going off, storming over to get in Ocean's face. August let go of his sister and went in search of alcohol, ruffling her hair affectionately as he went. Adele moved over to River and stood next to him, watching the tiny, feisty girl go to town on their taciturn cop brother.
“Hey,” River said, his eyes never leaving Zoey's form.
“How are you?” Adele asked.
She always made sure to ask River that every single time she saw him, ever since he'd graduated and moved out of their family home. She felt like not enough people in his life checked in on him – not even their parents – so she'd taken it up as her job.
“Okay. Tired. Long day at work,” he sighed, then took a long pull on his beer.
“Yeah? You like it here?”
Adele tried to keep the eagerness out of her voice. August and Ocean would be going home to Pennsylvania soon – they had careers. Her parents would be moving back eventually, as well – they had a home and a mortgage and lives of their own. River was the only loose thread, as it were, and as selfish as it was, Adele was clinging to that thread.
She hoped he would stay.
“It's the same as anywhere else,” he replied with a shrug. “This job is paying really good, so I'm gonna stay until it's done. If they offer me a permanent spot on the crew, I might consider moving for good.”
For the first time since she'd woken up, Adele felt truly happy. A warmth spread out from her chest and she smiled before coiling her arms around her brother's bicep. She hugged close to him and leaned her head on his shoulder.