“What’s going on with Garrett?” Megan asked.
She waved her hand in frustration. “Nothing you don’t already know. He’s Neil’s cousin, so he’s a groomsman now, thanks to their domineering grandmother . . . who, by the way, creeps me out. She watches everything like a damn eagle. What woman drags her grandson to a wedding shower? And why did he agree to come?” Her voice rose, and she knew she was losing control once more.
Megan leaned forward. “We all know his grandmother dragged him here. That’s not why we’re hiding in my kitchen while Neil’s niece and nephew destroy my parents’ backyard. How do you feel about him being here?”
She kept her voice cold. “I’m unhappy about it, and I have every right to be. What woman wants her ex-boyfriend at her wedding shower?”
“Blair,” Megan protested. “Josh told me it was pretty obvious there were some major sparks between you and Garrett. You can’t ignore that. Especially since you and Neil have none.”
Her eyes narrowed. “We have sparks.”
“Oh, please!” Libby snorted. “We all saw that kiss with Neil. Talk about awkward. If we counted on your chemistry to start a fire in a blizzard, we’d freeze to death. There is nothing there.”
“He caught me off guard,” Blair said in defense. “Besides, there’s more to a relationship than sparks.”
“Surely you don’t believe that,” Libby said softly. “Why won’t you tell us how you feel?”
“Again with the feelings,” Blair moaned. “Why do we have to discuss feelings?”
Megan frowned. “Because no matter what front you present to the world, you are not a cyborg. We’re your friends; we know you are actually capable of emotion.”
Blair lifted her eyebrows. “Cyborg?”
Megan shook her head and made a dismissive gesture with one hand. “Josh’s influence, but so not the point.”
“But it is the point,” Blair protested. “It’s exactly the point.” She put her hand on the counter and leaned forward. “Since when have you ever paid attention to anything the least bit sci-fi?” She turned to Libby. “And when did you start having guys as friends?” She waited for a moment, then pressed on, as if delivering a rousing closing statement in court. “You two have relationships I don’t understand. Have I been judgmental?”
“Yes,” both of her friends said simultaneously.
“Okay,” she agreed. “I have. But you still have them anyway, right? Live and let live—isn’t that your motto, Libby?”
She grimaced. “Not exactly . . .”
“Close enough. But isn’t it hypocritical of you guys to judge me when you’re doing exactly what you want? Why can’t I?”
They exchanged exasperated looks, then Megan turned to Blair. “You’re right, in a way. But we’re both happy. You’re not.”
“I am—”
Megan’s eyes narrowed. “Please don’t insult us. We know you too well for that.”
Blair sighed and stood upright. “Just because Neil and I don’t hold hands and make out in public doesn’t mean I’m not happy. Everyone has their own definition of happy.”
“And what’s yours?”
She’d never really asked herself that question before. “Winning every case and making partner.”
“And?”
She shrugged. “Probably buying a house and doing some traveling.”
Megan’s eyes pierced hers. “Where does Neil fit into this?”
Blair groaned. “He’s part of it.”
“Yet you made no mention of him.” Megan held up her hands when Blair started to protest. “Do you love him?”
Blair didn’t answer. She knew Megan and Libby didn’t understand her feelings for him, but she wasn’t like them. She didn’t expect them to understand.
Megan looked hopeful. “And what about Garrett?”
Blair’s back stiffened. “Why are we back to him?”
“Even if Josh hadn’t caught you guys in this kitchen, it’s plain as day he’s still interested in you. And I can tell you still feel something for him. So can Libby.” Megan continued to stare at her, waiting for some sort of response. “What are you going to do about it?”
A molten core of anger erupted in her then. “I’m not going to do a damn thing about it. I’m getting married, Megan, in case you didn’t get the clue from the gold embossed invitation and the taffeta bridesmaid dress.”
Libby exchanged a look with Megan before turning toward Blair. “We want you to rethink this wedding.”
“Why?” she asked, sounding snotty. “Because you don’t approve of the way I reacted to Neil’s kiss?”
“Blair,” Libby sighed.
She shook her head. “Our relationship isn’t based on passion and hormones. I’ve already told you that. Many times.”
“And each time I keep hoping you’re pulling my leg. That’s no kind of relationship at all.”
“I’ve done the whole can’t eat or sleep, let the guy consume your every thought relationship, and look how that turned out.”
“Blair,” Megan said, lowering her voice. “You can’t give up on love because you got your heart broken one time.”
“Yes, I can.”