Home > The Summer That Made Us(2)

The Summer That Made Us(2)
Author: Robyn Carr

Michael did want them to marry one day to establish that their commitment was real, fearless and holy.

“Holy?” she’d asked with a laugh. “When did you get religious?”

“I just mean I’m not afraid to make a lifetime pledge. I want to do that. Someday.”

By the time little Eric was four years old, Charley had graduated from Berkeley and been in the workforce for some time, moving up very quickly in the world of television. She used the name Berkey, dropping Hempstead. She said it was better for television, but truthfully, she was still angry with her parents and secretly hoped it would piss them off. Michael was a full professor at Stanford. Charley went from production in the San Francisco affiliate, to weather reporter, then anchorwoman, and it wasn’t long before she took over a local morning talk show. The ratings soared and she was picked up by other markets. She bought herself a town house in the city—a very nice town house with a view—which she had used every nickel plus loans to buy. It was not only a great investment but convenient. Even though there were two houses between them, they managed to spend most nights together. If they stayed with her in the city, Eric and Michael would head back to Michael’s Palo Alto house and that was where Eric went to school. Charley’s house wasn’t entirely an indulgence. She reported to the studio at four a.m. and as long as she lived in the city the station sent a car for her.

They’d been together for twenty-two years. They’d had arguments here and there, power struggles over how to raise Eric or how the money should be spent, and conflicting political ideas. They managed well for two people with demanding careers and a child they were devoted to; they made such an exceptional team they were the envy of many long-married friends. The subject of their own marriage hardly ever came up.

Then Charley’s world turned on its ear. She had not been prepared for the network to pull her show without warning. She had no backup plan. At almost the same moment Megan was undergoing radical chemo to precede a bone marrow transplant. The doctors gave her a fifty-fifty chance of surviving the cancer, which had spread, and the chemo had already nearly wiped her out. Charley was not prepared to lose another sister.

And she was not prepared to have no career. Her career was her identity; she was proud of it. She had been successful.

“Sounds like a good time for us to get married,” Michael said.

She was stunned. “What, in your twisted mind, makes you think this is a good time for me?” she asked, gobsmacked. “And what, pray, do you think marriage will do to make it good?”

He frowned at her. “You’re not working. You don’t have anything else going on. You said you weren’t prepared to dive into the job search immediately, that you needed a rest and time to think, which is a very good decision. I’m going to Cambridge in the fall for one semester. You should come with me.”

“So you’re going to rescue me?” she asked.

“I hadn’t thought of it exactly like that, but wouldn’t it take some of the stress off you?”

“Very sensitive, Michael,” she said. “My job loss and my dying sister make it a convenient time for you to drag me to England for six months. How perfectly relaxing.”

“If you’re going to be irrational, I withdraw my offer.”

“You needn’t withdraw it,” she said. “I decline the very romantic proposal.”

“You want romance, Charley? Here’s the romance of it! My father died when he was fifty-seven. I’m fifty-four. I’m perfectly comfortable with our relationship except for one thing—Eric. No, that’s not all—there are several things actually. If my fate is similar, I’d like to leave a widow, not a girlfriend. I’d like to bypass inheritance issues. Hell, if I’m sick in a hospital I don’t want you to be denied being at my bedside because you’re not my wife.”

“Who’s going to bar my way? Our son? Your mother, who adores me? Your sister, who wants to be my best friend? Girlfriend! After twenty-two years and a son!”

“You know you’re more than a girlfriend,” he said.

“But apparently you don’t!”

“I didn’t think it mattered, being unmarried,” he said. “Lately it’s started to matter to me. I love you. You love me. I’d like a legal commitment. I want there to be no doubt how we feel about each other.”

“I didn’t think there was any doubt,” she said. “Apparently you have some doubts if you suddenly need to legalize things.”

“It’s not doubt,” he said. “It’s the feeling that something is missing. As I get older that feeling gets stronger.”

“And so you decided that this moment, when I’m crushed by suddenly being fired and terrified that my sister could die...this would be the best moment for me to make a decision like this?”

“We could have an extended honeymoon in England,” he said.

“While you work? What is it you expect me to do while you’re working?”

“I’m sure you wouldn’t be bored. Look, this isn’t just for us but also for Eric. For Eric’s children. But I don’t want to push you into making a commitment you don’t feel.”

“Eric is eighteen,” she rallied. “We have, if nothing else, a common-law marriage.”

“Common-law?” he shouted back. “Is that good enough for you? Because it’s not good enough for me!”

Of course the argument escalated from there as all of the frustration and fear and disappointment poured out of her.

It ended with her saying she needed to go see Megan and him saying, “Maybe that’s a good idea.”

She told herself their relationship wasn’t falling apart. They bickered but also said “I love you” a lot. She didn’t leave Palo Alto angry, but she did leave worried and confused. Why did he doubt her now after all these years? And why, for God’s sake, was she refusing to legally marry him? He’d been the only man in her life for twenty-two years! What was wrong with them?

Maybe with time apart she’d figure that out.

* * *

Charley had been in Minneapolis with Megan and John for a few days, watching as her sister grew a little stronger every day. She’d seen Eric right before she left and had talked to him since she’d arrived. He was a freshman at Stanford, where his tuition was free, one of the perks of having a professor father. He didn’t live with his father, however. He agreed to Stanford but he was ready for a little independence. He was in a dorm but he’d pledged a fraternity and in a couple of years he’d live in a frat house, something that made Charley shudder. But she completely understood.

She called Michael. “How are you? I miss you,” she said.

“I like the sound of that,” he said.

“Are you walking? It sounds like you’re walking...”

“To my car. I’m done for the day but I have to go back for a department meeting tonight.”

“Have you seen Eric?” she asked.

Michael laughed. “He sees me as little as possible. I have to make an appointment. He texts me. I think he does that to keep me from trying to find him and actually talk to him. He’s getting decent grades so I guess he’s all right.”

“I probably talk to him more than you do,” she said. “I responded to one of his texts and told him that was not going to scratch my mother-itch—I had to hear the sound of his voice. So he calls. He’s placating us.”

“More like playing us. He’s keeping us out of his business,” Michael said. “He’s building his own life.”

“Michael, I miss you, but I’m staying here awhile. Meg is getting stronger. That doesn’t necessarily mean she’s out of the woods, but it’s such a relief. She’s eating. She’s up and about. Reading. She doesn’t have a lot of energy but it’s better than none.”

“I’m glad to hear she’s feeling better,” he said.

“She wants to go to the lake house for the summer,” Charley said. “I’m going to drive up there, see how it looks, maybe do some repairs, see if I can get it ready. And I can’t let her go alone.”

Michael was quiet for a moment. She heard his car door open, then close. “I understand.” Something in his voice said he was disappointed, that he’d rather they spend the summer working out whatever was wrong with them, not being apart.

“I’m going to take care of things like that, then I’ll come home to visit, to spend some quality time with you. I can put someone else in charge. Maybe John can take some time off. So, give me a little time to get the lake house straightened out, then we’ll talk about your schedule. When you have a little time for me...”

“I’ll make time for you,” he said. “I miss you, too. I even miss fighting with you.”

“We don’t fight much,” she said. “Do we?”

“We’ve been fighting too much. Just about that M word. I think you have a deep psychological fuckup that makes you scared of it and you should seek help.”

She laughed in spite of herself. “You’re probably right. Add that to all my deep psychological fuckups. But I’m going to see you before too long. I’m really no good without you. You’re my rock. I love you.”

He let out his breath. “That was nice to hear,” he said. “I love you, too.”

What is wrong with me? she asked herself. Why not just agree to marry him, go to England with him, settle in as a wife, adjust to that new title? It wasn’t as though she’d give him up at the point of a gun. Then why not just marry him if that’s what he wanted?

Because right now she felt very vulnerable and dependent. She didn’t feel whole. Michael hadn’t exactly said, “Since you have nothing better to do, we might as well get married,” but his presentation left her feeling worthless. And who was going to feel sorry for her? She had twelve years of extremely well-compensated success. People said she should take a year off, clear out the cobwebs, rest and relax.

   
Most Popular
» Magical Midlife Meeting (Leveling Up #5)
» Magical Midlife Love (Leveling Up #4)
» The ​Crown of Gilded Bones (Blood and Ash
» Lover Unveiled (Black Dagger Brotherhood #1
» A Warm Heart in Winter (Black Dagger Brothe
» Meant to Be Immortal (Argeneau #32)
» Shadowed Steel (Heirs of Chicagoland #3)
» Wicked Hour (Heirs of Chicagoland #2)
» Wild Hunger (Heirs of Chicagoland #1)
» The Bromance Book Club (Bromance Book Club
» Crazy Stupid Bromance (Bromance Book Club #
» Undercover Bromance (Bromance Book Club #2)
romance.readsbookonline.com Copyright 2016 - 2024