Sidney began to suspect David had never loved her, had never been faithful, and she was too busy and too inexperienced in things like romance and relationships to see the signs. She remembered his opening line to her. “I saw an article about you in the LA Times—young physicist making waves in quantum computing.” He probably thought cha-ching. Meal ticket.
David began the divorce proceedings immediately. After all she’d done to support him he wanted half of everything they had accrued—half the savings, half the house, half of her pension! He was going to take everything she had and she’d be forced to start over. She should have found her own attorney at once but Sidney couldn’t move. She couldn’t function. She couldn’t get out of bed. Her students and coworkers emailed but she didn’t open the computer. They called her but she didn’t answer the phone. She didn’t answer the door. It was her elderly neighbor who had watched the house once when she visited Rob who’d unearthed his phone number and called him.
“Is Sidney there with you?” she had asked.
“With me? No! I’ve left her a couple of messages and she hasn’t returned my calls, but Sidney gets like that sometimes. If she gets really busy at the university, she just doesn’t pay attention.”
“Ever since David left her—”
“What?” Rob had shouted into the phone.
“You didn’t know? She didn’t want to talk about it but I’m so worried now. She’s been getting so thin, looking so wounded. I haven’t seen her in days and she won’t answer the door. I’m afraid she’s done something to herself. Her husband hasn’t been around. And she didn’t say she was going away.”
“Good God, call the police! Break down the door. Please make sure she’s in there, that she’s all right. I’ll be on the next plane.”
By the time Rob arrived Sid had been taken to the hospital by ambulance. An IV replaced fluids so she wasn’t dehydrated any longer, and she’d been medicated. But mentally and emotionally, she was ruined. Rob sat on the edge of her bed, took her hand in his and said, “Sid, what were you trying to do?”
It took her a very long time to speak. At long last, she said, “I don’t know. I didn’t know what to do.”
She felt she had failed so monumentally she couldn’t move. It wasn’t just that her marriage didn’t work; it was that she could be so successful in her field and not even notice her marriage didn’t work.
He pulled her into his arms and they wept.
Her doctors wanted to keep her in the hospital—in the psych ward. But Rob worked with them to find a good facility in Colorado. She needed medication and therapy. Rob brought Sid into his home after a brief and healing stint in the hospital, got her set up with a therapist. He hired a lawyer to represent Sid and helped her work through her divorce. Day by day, hour by hour, she got back on her feet. It wasn’t easy; it wasn’t quick.
Sidney had never been very emotional and she certainly wasn’t a romantic. She was a scientist, a pragmatist, living in a world of equations and computations. But now she knew how dangerous a broken heart could be. And she learned how awful having no family, no real emotional bonds, could be.
She had had an emotional meltdown and what she learned was so ridiculously simple she felt even more stupid. She had not been living a balanced life. She had been completely absorbed in difficult work, had been physically tired, had no love in her life, became isolated and her defenses were down.
She collapsed.
Rob brought her into the bar, at first to lend a hand or have a meal with the boys. Eventually she worked her way into the business, getting to know the patrons, becoming friends with the other employees, getting to know the people in the town. Now it was her lifeline.
She still lived with her brother and nephews. She and Rob worked together to make sure the boys had everything they needed and the full support of parental figures. Sean and Finn were smart, athletic and funny. College was on the horizon.
“We’re going to turn into one of those odd brother and sister couples who no one understands and who live into old age together without changing anything,” Sid joked.
The town didn’t know all she’d been through. She was divorced, as were many people. They only knew a little of what Rob had been through, burying a young wife when his sons were only six and eight.
There was one thing that continued to plague her. How could her ex-husband treat her with that kind of selfish cruelty, use her as he had, abandon her the way he did and sleep at night? She tried not to think about that too much; it made her too sad. She was not known as a sad person. She was well liked and considered to be bright and funny and helpful.
There were plenty of attractive, personable men in Timberlake. She’d even been asked out. Could she ever be friends with a man again? She thought probably not.
But she took an oath. She was never going to let herself be that isolated and overworked again. She planned to surround herself with family and friends. Casual friends, not lovers.
* * *
By the time Cal got back from Denver, Dakota had signed his rental agreement, moved in his meager belongings and been hired by the county to haul trash part-time, starting in ten days. There would be a few days of training first, though how one trained in picking up garbage eluded him. He hoped they’d let him drive the big truck.
“Wow,” Cal said. “This almost sounds like you really are staying awhile.”
“Awhile,” he said, noncommittal.
“Gonna show me your place?” Cal asked.
“Certainly. Whenever you’re ready.”
“Let’s go!”
Cal jumped in the Jeep and they drove for about fifteen minutes to the little cabin in the woods. Dakota drove slowly over the bridge. “I hear this creek swells in spring. If it gets bad, I guess I’ll have to pole-vault home.”
“This is downright...cute,” Cal said.
“Be careful there,” he said. “It’s manly.”
“That, too,” Cal said.
“I just bought two canvas deck chairs. We can sit on the porch and have a beer and watch the deer and bunnies.”
They went inside and Cal admired the wood floors, the appliances, the big table, the stone fireplace. “This is not bad,” he pronounced.
“I like it,” Dakota said.
“Kind of all alone out here, isn’t it?”
“That’s the part I like best,” Dakota said. “But it turns out I have Wi-Fi. I’m not sure how good it is but if it’s terrible I’ll just spend a lot of time at your place. Or Sully’s. Or Sierra’s. Hey, when is Sierra getting married?”
Cal looked at him in surprise. “Are you concerned?”
“Nah, but I want to make sure she’s taken care of. You know?”
Cal put his hands on his hips. “No, I don’t know. You’ve hardly communicated, now you’re taking care of people?”
“To be honest, I never thought I’d be around family. I don’t hate it,” he added, smiling.
“Why didn’t that occur to you before?” Cal asked.
“Seriously?” Dakota said. “Let’s see. Not only was I in the Army, you were in Michigan! What’s the matter, was the North Pole full? Dad was in the twilight zone. Mom was pretty much there with him, and Sierra was under the influence. Are you suggesting I should have gone to live near Sedona so she could run my life?”
“You have a point,” Cal said.
“Who knew you and Sierra would settle in a cool place?”
“I never saw it coming, either,” Cal said. “I was just hiking. It was time and I was looking for the right place to scatter Lynne’s ashes...”
“And you end up at some old guy’s campground and he has a gorgeous daughter who just happens to be a neurosurgeon? How does that happen?”
“I must be living right,” Cal said. “You need anything? This stuff going to get you by?”
“I don’t need anything, Cal.”
“You don’t start your job for a while. It’s only part-time. If you need a little help, just say—”
Dakota put up his hand. “I left home seventeen years ago. I’ve gotten by without help, haven’t I?”
“I guess I always took it for granted that the Army was taking care of you,” Cal said. “We sure didn’t grow up soft, did we? But if there’s one thing we figured out early—there wasn’t much help available. Talk about training in making your own way.”
“That brings something to mind. Does everyone around here know how we grew up?”
“Everyone? I doubt everyone knows the details. The people we’re close to know. I took Maggie to the farm to meet the folks before we got married, giving her one last chance to run for her life.”
“And she didn’t run?”
“Nah,” he said. “Maggie’s tolerance and compassion far outpaces anything I’ve encountered. That’s one of the things I love about her.”
Dakota didn’t look at his brother but he could feel Cal’s eyes on him.
“You’re wasting a lot of energy still being mad at them,” Cal said.
“They weren’t exactly sterling parents,” Dakota said. “And it’s not because they were poor—there’s something honorable about being poor and holding it together. They were negligent. Jed should’ve been on medication! Marissa should have insisted.”
“Know what Maggie said about that? She said she’s had a lot of people refuse medical treatment for a variety of reasons. Sometimes they find the treatment worse than the disease, sometimes they’re afraid, sometimes they’ve made peace with their dysfunction and know how to live with it. He might not have been the best father but Jed is still a gentle soul. Crazy, but sweet. Scared of his own shadow but kind. He was always so good in his heart.”
“As he talked about his design of Apollo 13, or his Nobel nomination or some other delusion.”