I carry a box of personal effects up the steps of the girls’ dorm, Miranda on my heels. She’s got Good Charlotte’s California (The Way I Say I Love You) playing on her phone, humming the lyrics as we climb the stairs. I don’t tell her, but the lyrics are making me cry.
If only Charlie were here, I think as I step into the empty dorm room, opening up the window and closing my eyes against the cool, fresh breeze of autumn. A few weeks ago, I turned nineteen, and the boys and I went to have waffles (covered in peanut butter and syrup, of course) at the Railroad Station. We saved a seat for Charlie, and I put his picture on the table across from me.
Isabella and Jennifer joined us, and I enjoyed their company more than I expected. Of course, neither of them understands how I can possibly be dating five guys, possibly be in love five times over, but … that’s okay. They don’t have to understand. The only people that have to understand how it works … are us.
“Babe, my dorm is so far away from yours,” Zayd groans as he slinks in and collapse on my bare mattress. I've got some cute new sheets with little harps all over them. I think they’re supposed to be Christmas sheets or something, but hey, a harp’s a harp. “And the second floor? How cruel. I’ll need to bring a ladder, so I can sneak into your room.”
“You don’t have to sneak, you goofball,” I murmur, moving over to the bed and flicking him in the forehead. He pulls me down on the bed next to him as Miranda rolls her eyes and starts to put her pale pink sheets on her own bed, pausing only when a text comes in from Andrew, all the way down in Stanford. I wonder if his relationship with that Ross guy will work, this far apart?
Only time will tell.
“Andrew and Ross both say hi,” Miranda tells us as Zack comes up, carrying the heaviest of my boxes under his arm. Creed is yawning and carrying … a pillow, how appropriate. That, and a stack of manga under his other arm. He tosses a few boys’ love volumes down on my bed, all of them with embarrassingly explicit covers, and I snatch them up in my arms, giving him a look.
Tristan and Windsor are last, each holding a medium-sized box.
“That should do it,” Wind says, putting his hands on his hips and looking around. “Not bad, for a commoner’s dorm, that is.”
“Hah,” I say, standing up and moving around the bed to shelve my new manga books. “You’re all in commoner’s dorms, too, don’t forget.”
“So we are,” Windsor agrees as Tristan reaches down and takes the photo of Charlie out of my box. He looks at it for a moment before passing it over to me. I take it, our fingers brushing, fire shooting through my arm and straight to my chest.
“Let’s hit the cafeteria, and see what they’ve got to eat around here,” he says, his voice low and smooth, just like cognac. Miranda lets the song on her phone play on repeat, so it starts all over again as I hug the picture against me for a moment.
“You guys go ahead, and I’ll be right there. Wait outside for me, okay?”
“Anything for you, Marnye-bear,” Zack says, using my dad’s nickname for me before he kisses me on the lips, a searing brush of mouths that leaves me wanting more.
“Don’t take too long, or I’ll get lonely,” Creed purrs, trailing his fingers down my arm before he leaves the room, and the rest of the guys follow. Miranda pauses at the last second, looking back at me with soft, sad eyes.
I wonder if she still has a crush on me … or if she’s over it now? It’s impossible to tell because she loves me so much, it’d be difficult to spot the difference.
“I’ll keep them in line for you, beat off all the hungry co-eds with a stick.” She pauses, smiling again before she takes off down the hall, leaving her phone behind her, that damn song playing like the ending theme to my story.
Here’s the thing though: my story isn’t ending.
No, it’s just fucking beginning.
I don’t know what’s going to happen later, or how the rest of my life will pan out. Nobody knows that sort of thing, but what I do know is that I’m at the university I always wanted to go to, with the boys I want to be with, and the best friend who was always by my side. The Infinity Club is still out there, but … that’s there. That’s there, and I’m here.
I’m here, and that’s my happily ever after.
Life is always ticking by, one second at a time, and nothing is over until it’s over, but … for now, I’m happy resting in the arms of the elite. For now, this is exactly what I need.
“I miss you, Dad,” I whisper, putting his picture on my bedside table, grabbing my bag, and heading out the door to join my new family for our first on-campus dinner. I blow him one, final kiss before I close the door behind me, and step out into my new life. “And I love you. Forever and always.”
The End…