Closing our eyes, we babystepped into the bathroom and stood in front of the vanity. Mia counted us off.
“One. Two.” She took a deep breath. “Three.”
We opened our eyes.
“What the hell is that?” Coco said. “It looks like a divide sign.”
“It’s a sign that Lucas and I are going to be divided over this!” Mia wailed tearfully.
“Will you stop? It’s a plus,” I said. “It’s just faint. But it’s a plus, Mia. You’re pregnant.” Immediately, Coco and I began jumping up and down like rabid kangaroos. Poor Mia looked shell shocked.
“Oh my God, oh my God!” Coco stage whispered. “Mia, it’s positive! Congratulations!”
My throat was glued shut otherwise I’d have congratulated her too.
“It’s positive,” Mia said in a small voice. “It’s positive.”
“It is. How do you feel?” Coco studied her face. “Are you OK?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. I need to sit down.” She backed up and sat on the edge of their tub. “OK.” Putting both hands over her stomach, she breathed slowly in and out. “This could be OK.”
“It’s more than OK.” I knelt in front of her, and Coco sat beside her. “It’s wonderful. I’m so happy for you.”
“It’s more than wonderful. We could make a list of all the wonderful things about this.” Coco tipped her head onto Mia’s shoulder.”
“You think?” Mia sounded hopeful.
“Yes!” I said. “One. This baby will be gorgeous. Can’t miss.”
“Right,” agreed Coco. “Two. You will be the best mommy ever because you’re always so prepared for everything.”
“Yes. Three.” I gestured to Coco and myself. “Built-in babysitters when you need a night off.”
“Definitely.” Coco nodded. “Four. Um…” She looked at me for help.
“Um.” I chewed my lip trying to think of something else. “Expectant Mom parking at the drugstore?”
Mia laughed. “Right. That’s important.”
“It is!” I thumped her legs. “Mommy.”
“Shhhhhh!” Mia glanced at the door. “OK, now what? I have to tell him, right?”
“Uh, yes.” Coco stood. “He probably should have known before us, but we can pretend we know nothing and hightail it out of here. You can say you took the test when we left.”
“No, no, no.” She shook her head. “I won’t lie to him about it. I’ll just be honest. He knows how close we are.”
I got to my feet. “I think you’re right. Lucas is a good guy. He’ll understand. Plus he will so know something’s up when he sees Coco and me sneaking out of here. She has no poker face whatsoever.”
Mia smiled, rising from the tub. “True. OK, I’m going. But before I do…” She and Coco exchanged a look. “We need to know. Did Charlie show up last night?”
Coco laughed. “He must have. Look how fast she blushed!”
“Ahem, yes he did. But no, we didn’t.” I gave them an angelic expression, as if it had been my choice not to bang.
“You didn’t? Why not?” Coco looked confused.
“I told you. Just friends.” Thank God I had a poker face. I was lying through my teeth.
“He came over late last night to be just friends with you?” Mia asked.
I shrugged. “Apparently. I mean, I don’t know exactly what was on his mind because he’s not really good at telling me what he’s thinking unless it’s A, dirty, or B, how wrong he is for me.”
“He looks like that and he talks dirty?” Mia fanned herself.
“Yes.” My face got hotter. “But there was no dirty talk last night. There was no nothing. Not even a hug.” Damn him.
“Why not?” Coco asked. “You can hug a friend.”
“For one thing, he left after I fell asleep on the couch. For another, he has issues with gestures of physical affection unless they’re sexual. When he says goodbye, he just walks out, even if we were naked like an hour before.”
“Weird.” Mia shook her head, then sighed. “Too bad. I thought you two made a cute couple, in a sort of opposites-attract kind of way.”
“Me too,” confessed Coco.
“Nope, sorry.” Avoiding their eyes, I picked up my coffee cup from the dresser and headed back down the stairs. There would be no cute couple.
#
Coco and I ended up getting out the front door without Lucas noticing us, and we said goodbye out on the street, whispering quickly about a baby shower and promising to talk more soon. While my car warmed up, I looked out the window at Mia and Lucas’s townhouse. Was she telling him now? I smiled. What an amazing moment in life, to tell someone he’s going to be a father. I wondered if I’d ever experience anything like it. I wanted children, eventually, but I had no idea when that eventually would take place. I wasn’t like Mia, who knew she wanted to have kids before she turned thirty. Coco and Nick would probably have kids soon, too. Their kids would be able to play when we all got together.
Then I frowned, picturing myself as the lonely spinster aunt, coming to parties with toys and spinach dip but no significant other.
No, stop that. You’ll be the fun, crazy aunt that all the kids adore. They’ll beg to have you babysit and sleep over and take them places. Then you can drop them off when you’re done with them and go home to your nice, quiet townhouse. You can drink wine for dinner, watch what you want on TV, and sleep in.