Her breasts pressed up against my back; her arms wrapped around my waist. “I’m sorry.”
I couldn’t trust myself to speak. I’d always been good with words, even better with my intellect, but in that moment I had nothing. I didn’t know what to say because I’d never been in a situation so out of my control — so completely out of my element that all I wanted to do was push it to the farthest part of my brain so I wouldn’t have to think about it.
So I wouldn’t feel.
“I’m sorry I told you not to come after me.” Andi sighed, pressing a kiss against my back. “And I’m sorry I did it in front of the guys… but what I’m most sorry about is that you’re in this position, somewhere you never wanted to be in the first place.”
I let out a heavy sigh, my chest squeezing tight. Slowly, I peeled her hands away from my waist and turned. Her brown eyes were large, focused, sad. It killed me, because Andi wasn’t one of those people. Sadness looked completely foreign on her.
I hated it.
I hated it so much I vowed in that moment to do everything in my power to extinguish that emotion forever.
I wasn’t a soft person.
A tender lover.
A thinker — when it came to the opposite sex. But everything about her made me think. As water cascaded down her soft face, I thought. I thought so hard I was convinced she could hear my thoughts.
She was beautiful.
Breathtaking.
Brave.
And mine.
My lips found hers. I kissed her softly, tasting the water on her mouth, sucking it between my teeth. “I’m exactly where I want to be. I just never knew it… until now.”
Our mouths collided in a heated frenzy as I lifted her into the air then pressed her against the shower wall. My hands slid down her thighs as she clenched around me tightly.
Her blond hair stuck to her cheeks. I moved my lips to her ear, licking the trickle of water down her neck, following its trail all the way to her small breasts.
My mouth sucked along every inch that the water traveled, my lips unable to do anything except taste. I flicked my tongue — and gained a painful jerk as she tugged my hair back and let out a moan.
I wasn’t gentleman enough to ask her if she wanted more.
Because I wasn’t going to be gentleman enough to stop if she said no.
I was desperate in a way I’d never been before, to feel her, to feel all of her and, most of all, to forget that in a few short months…
I wouldn’t be able to feel that heart beat.
I wouldn’t be able to lick her skin.
Her taste would be long forgotten.
A frenzied sort of madness over took my senses as I slammed my mouth against hers, willing her to live, willing her to fight, making promises with my lips that I knew I could never speak aloud — because if I did, it would make it real. It would make what we were going to go through real.
And I didn’t want real.
Not anymore.
Tension built between us. She jerked my lower lip between her teeth then kissed me deeper, harder, faster.
I didn’t ask if she was ready. I didn’t need to.
I just… knew.
As if we’d been long lost lovers… as if we’d been made to be together.
One thrust, and I was inside of her, moving with her, living with her. Sharp nails dragged across my back, and then her hands found my hair again. With each movement of my hips, she tugged harder.
Heat surged between our bodies.
Every muscle tensed in her body. I only cared about her — not myself — and that’s when I knew I was already gone. Screwed the minute I’d said yes to her.
I softened my kiss as her body slowly tensed and then released. Her big brown eyes blinked at me slowly. I was completely transfixed as my world tilted on its axis and became solely about something other than myself — someone.
Winking, she hooked her ankles tighter around my body. It was uncontrollable, the way I let go, the way she allowed me to.
It was silent except for the sound of the water slamming against the riverrockk and our own labored breathing
“Fourteen.” She slid down my body, her teeth tugging my ear as she whispered the number against my skin. “You gonna keep a tally of this on your other side?”
I barked out a laugh. “Epic moments deserve to be remembered.”
“Promise me something?”
“Anything.” I reached for her hand. Who was this man? This person talking? I didn’t recognize myself, wasn’t sure I wanted to.
“Remember us.”
It took me a while to register what she was referring to. My tattoos, remembering us. I tried to lighten the mood. “I’m not putting Stoli vodka in ink on my body, Andi. I don’t care how much you like the stuff.”
She burst out laughing then launched herself into my arms, wrapping her legs around my waist for the second time in the past half hour. Our foreheads touched. I brought her underneath the middle of the shower and kissed her mouth.
“Our symbol would be something cooler… like… something from our honeymoon trip.”
“Oh, so like the number fifteen?”
“Exactly!” She giggled. “I knew I chose well when I chose you, Italy.”
I rolled my eyes and set her on her feet. One minute she was standing; the next she was collapsing into my arms.
“Andi?” I caught her before she hit her head. “Andi, can you hear me?”
“Of course!” She laughed. “You’re yelling in a shower.”