“But what if they’re wrong?” I asked before I could stop myself.
She let me go and moved to fix me a plate. “Then fate steps in and fixes things. You just have to trust it.”
I didn’t say any more. But her words played over in my head, and I hoped she was right.
You’ll Lose Her If You Don’t
CHAPTER 44
WEST
“Mom’s bringing waffles,” Brady said as he opened the curtains in my room and let the sunlight pour inside. “Get up and get showered. Nash is still asleep on the sofa. I’ll throw some ice on him before I leave. It’s the only way he’ll get up.”
We had stayed up most of the night. The guys had tried to get my mind off things, but it hadn’t worked. They just made it so I hadn’t been alone. If I had, I’d have ended up at Maggie’s window. More than once last night I wondered if that was why Brady had come over with all the guys. To keep me from going to Maggie. I wanted to resent him for it, but he was the only one who could keep me sane right now.
He told me about talking to her and how he really felt like she needed time to herself, to accept how far she’d come. It was all too much for her, and I was scaring her with my intensity on top of it. Thing was, I didn’t know how to be any other way with her. She made me a little crazy.
“You taking Maggie to school?” I asked him, knowing the answer.
He didn’t say anything at first, but finally he gave me one small nod. “I’ll eat at my house. The rest of the guys are up and dressed, waiting on Mom to come feed them. I think they left you hot water.”
“How do I handle today?” I asked him before he could leave the room.
He turned to glance back at me. “You give her space. You realize you can survive without her to lean on, and you make it through.”
He didn’t get it. He’d never been in love. What did he mean by space? Was I just supposed to ignore her? So I asked him, “How do I give her space?”
He shrugged. “You know, just leave her alone. Let her breathe.”
“Ignore her?” I asked. My voice was hard and angry, but I couldn’t help it.
He raised his eyebrows. “Yeah. I guess so.”
I stood up and threw my pillow across the room. “Fuck that! How the hell am I supposed to ignore her, Brady? Huh? I can’t ignore her. I’m in love with her.”
I’d never said that aloud before. Not even to her.
“If that’s so, then you need to find a way to back off. You’ll lose her if you don’t.”
“I’ve already lost her.” The words sliced through me as I said them.
“No, you haven’t. I’ve talked to her. Remember? I know what she’s thinking. All you did was scare her. She believes she’s just your crutch and nothing more. That’s why she’s doing this. I can assure you, she has no idea you love her.”
I should have told her. “If I tell her—”
“She won’t believe you. She’ll think you’re telling her whatever it takes to get her back. You’re going to have to let her go.”
I’d never be able to let her go. But I could pretend that I had if it’s what she needed from me. She’d been there for me when I needed her. It was time I did whatever I had to do to make her happy. If stepping back was it, then I’d do it.
Asa and Gunner both stayed until I left the house, trying to get me to ride with one of them. But I wanted the freedom of having my truck. When I finally pulled out of the drive and headed to school, they followed behind me. It was like they had to be sure I was going to show up for class.
I timed it so I was walking in just as the last bell rang. Now we would all be late to first period. But I hadn’t asked them to wait on me. I just couldn’t handle going to my locker and seeing Maggie. I wouldn’t be able to ignore her, and I didn’t trust I wouldn’t start begging her right there in front of everyone.
“I got Mr. Tremble first period,” Asa said with a grin. “He won’t count me late,” he added as he ran past me.
Gunner came up beside me. “We won’t get counted late either if we hurry.”
I didn’t mind getting a late slip in exchange for putting off going to class. But I knew Coach would have me running suicides after practice if he got word I was late. That was protocol for a player being late to school.
“I need to grab my notebook,” I told Gunner.
He shoved a notebook at me. “Use this one and run,” he said before breaking into a run himself.
I followed behind him. When practice was over, I wanted to go home and be alone. Last night I hadn’t been given room to think. They had all meant well, but being by myself was what I wanted right now.
Gunner opened the door to our first-period class and stepped inside. Mrs. Sentle glanced up at us and frowned, then motioned for us to take a seat. “Glad you could join us, boys” was all she said.
I sat down beside Gunner, who found an empty desk first. He glanced at me and smirked. “Told ya.”
“Hey, West,” a blonde I didn’t know said as she turned to smile at me.
Gunner chuckled beside me. “The news you’re a free agent again is out.”
I ignored them both. If I was to prove to Maggie that I loved her, then girls like this one weren’t going to help. I shot Gunner an annoyed glare.
He just laughed harder. Asshole.
I Don’t Like Attention
CHAPTER 45