“Fine,” I pout. I am happy he is giving me time to get used to foreplay and building up to sex, but I still want to touch him like he touches me.
“You’re adorable when you pout.” He smiles before kissing me. “So how was your day? Did you go to your meeting?” he asks, running his hand along my back.
“Yes.” I hold my breath.
He doesn’t know the kind of meetings I am going to. I never told him what happened to me; I don’t want him to think I’m tainted or something, even though I know it’s stupid to feel that way. I just told him that I’m going to meetings to help with the loss of my mom. I feel bad about lying, but I don’t know how to tell him what the meetings are really for.
I started going to meetings two months ago, gathering all the information that first day he called me his girlfriend, and have gone once a week since then. I like having a group of women to talk to who understand what I’m feeling, even though I kind of feel like an imposter sitting with them. The things most of them have been through make me feel weak.
“You know, if you ever want to talk to me about how you’re dealing with the loss of your mom, I’m here for you.” He hugs me closer, the ball of guilt in my stomach getting heavier by the second.
“I know. Thank you,” I choke out. “I’m so sleepy,” I whisper, wanting to get away from talking. “I’m gonna head home.”
“Stay with me.” He hugs me again, making me feel sick. “You don’t work at the school tomorrow. We can sleep in.”
I want that. I want to sleep next to him, to have him hold me and make me feel better, but I just can’t. “I think I should go home,” I repeat more softly this time.
“All right, sweet Sophie,” he whispers, making me feel worse. He always does exactly what I want; he never pushes me.
“Thank you.”
I get off the bed and put on my bra and shirt before watching him pull his shirt back over his head. He follows me out into the living room, grabbing his keys. He always follows me home when I’m over here late. He walks me into my house to check everything out and then kisses me before leaving for the night, telling me to lock up after him while reminding me to set the alarm.
“I really wish you would stay,” he says gently.
“I just need time,” I tell him. Seeing the look on his face has me wanting to kick my own ass, but I don’t know what to do; I feel stuck.
“As long as you need, Sophie.” He hands me my keys.
I hope he’s not lying and doesn’t give up on me. I want to be better; I hate that I’m hurting him. I walk to him, wrapping my arms around his waist before lifting up on my toes while pulling his mouth down to mine for a kiss. I try to tell him everything with that one kiss. When I pull away, he looks at me and I can see that he’s searching my eyes, trying to understand. I wish I understood myself.
“All right. Let’s get you home.” He kisses my forehead before leading me out to my car.
I bite my cheek the whole way home, and I bite it harder as he kisses me goodnight. When the door finally closes behind him, I let the tears I’ve been holding in fall.
Chapter 6
Nico
I quietly open the door to my house, not wanting to wake Sophie, who stayed over to watch Daisy. We have been seeing each other for a few months now. I’m head over f**king heels in love with her crazy ass, yet only Kenton and Asher know about her. This is not by choice; I want my family to get to know her. The day Asher found out about Sophie, he, Kenton, and I had spent the morning moving Kenton’s ex’s shit to her house. As soon as we got back to my place, Kenton and Asher pulled a bottle of Jack out of my cabinet, claiming they were toasting to crazy bitches. Kenton looked at me and smiled right then, and I knew he was going to start some shit.
“How are things going with Sophie?” he asked, and Asher looked at me with a what-the-fuck-is-he-talking-about expression on his face.
“Things are fine,” I gritted out. Kenton knew I had my reasons for not telling my family about Sophie yet.
“Who’s Sophie?” Asher asked Kenton, completely cutting me out of the conversation.
“Who’s Sophie? Now isn’t that the million-dollar question?” Kenton asked, tapping his chin.
“Who’s Sophie?” Asher turned his attention to me, and I glared at Kenton, who shrugged before I looked at Asher.
“Sophie is—”
“Sophie is his boom,” Kenton said, cutting me off and laughing like this was the funniest shit in the whole world.
“What?” Asher asked in disbelief.
“It’s true. Why do you think he has been taking jobs that are closer to home and hasn’t been going to see y’all as often?”
“Jesus, do we need to go to the store so I can buy you some f**king tampons?” I growled at Kenton.
“At some point, you need to tell people what’s going on,” he said, making my temper flare.
“And I will when I’m f**king ready.”
“Why didn’t you say something?” Asher asked, and I could see him slipping into big-brother mode. I shook my head before looking at him again.
“Things with Sophie aren’t easy, and I need time before I bring her around everyone.”
“We’re your family.”
“Yes, and I will bring her around. Just not yet,” I told him firmly.
“Mom’s going to flip the f**k out,” Asher said, smiling.