What was Asher going to think? Seriously, we had only been together for a few months. I needed to buy a test. I needed proof. I let my head thud on the desk a few more times, hoping that it would put my brain cells back in order. I called Asher and told him that I was leaving the club, got in my car, and began the mission of getting proof.
I called Liz to go with me to Target. Her job was to provide a distraction if we came across anyone that we knew while in the store. Lord knows, if anyone from town saw me buying a pregnancy test, they would assume that I had gotten knocked up on purpose and rumors would run rampant.
“So, you’re late?” Liz asks, looking over at me.
“Late is an understatement,” I tell her as we walk down the aisle of the store. It’s ironic that tampons and pregnancy tests are located in the same section.
“So, what are you going to do if it’s positive?” She holds up a box, reading the back.
“I don’t know,” I say quietly.
“Well, you know he loves you so I'm sure everything will be okay.” She gives me a reassuring smile. I smile back and pick out a test. I thought about putting it in my purse until we reached check out, but I really didn’t want to get arrested for shoplifting, so I put it under my arm, trying to hide it. Going towards the front of the store, my worst fear is realized. Trevor walks around the corner.
“Hey, sis,” he says, trying to give me a hug, but the test is still under my arm and I don’t want it to fall out, so I half pat his back. “Liz,” he says, smiling, and I watch her face turn pink.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, looking around, trying to come up with a plan to abort the mission.
“I came with Cash. He’s picking up a cable for his TV.” He looks between me and Liz. “What are you doing here?” he asks and I look at Liz, hoping that she would think of something since my mind has gone blank.
“Tampons,” Liz blurts, and I notice a few people stop and look at us as she covers her mouth. Trevor seems taken aback for a second then he laughs, shaking his head.
“Well, I’ll let you guys get back to that.” He bends over, kissing my cheek, then reached over and tugs a piece of Liz’s hair. Without another look, he turns around and walks away.
“Tampons,” I hear Liz whisper to herself. I start giggling. “You owe me huge for this,” she says, groaning. After Trevor is out of sight, I run to check out with Liz following behind me.
“You guard the door while I take the test,” I tell Liz walking into the small stall.
“Let me know if you need me,” she says from the other side.
“Holy shit,” I whispered. There it is. The proof I wanted is right there in black and white. Okay, white and pink, but it is there in my face, proving that I'm an idiot. I’ve taken four tests, all different brands, so I know they couldn’t all be wrong. When I bought the first one and it came out with a giant plus sign, I left the stall that I had been holding up in. With Liz following behind me, we went and bought water from the coffee shop and a few more tests. Now all the tests have been taken and they all say the same thing. I had my proof. I shove the boxes and all except one of the tests into the little garbage can that hangs on the wall in the bathroom stall.
“You’re pregnant!” Liz squealed with excitement. I want to be happy, but I’m afraid about Asher’s reaction. “I hope it’s a girl. They always have so many cute girl things. So, what now?” she asks, looking at me expectantly.
“I…um, need to make a doctor’s appointment. I need to have them confirm it.”
“I'm pretty sure that the four tests you’ve taken confirm it.”
“I know. I mean, I need them to tell me that everything is okay, and that I haven’t harmed the baby over the last few months.”
Liz must have read the look on my face because she pulled me into a hug. “Hey, everything is going to work out,” she said quietly.
We decided to wander around Target. I needed time to think. I needed to figure out what the heck I was going to say to Asher. There was no way I could keep this from him. I didn’t want to keep this from him. I wanted his support. I needed him to tell me everything was going to be okay.
By the time we got to check out, the cart was overflowing. I knew how I was going to tell Asher that I was pregnant. Even if we didn’t plan this, I wanted it to be special. I also bought a few pairs of pregnancy pants with the stretchy material at the waist. My jeans were becoming so tight that I had to lie down to button them. I had been avoiding buying a bigger size. I didn’t want to admit to gaining weight. Now I knew I had to wear something bigger. It couldn’t be healthy for the baby to be squashed inside of me like that. Liz and I walked around the baby aisles looking at clothes, bedding, and toys. There were so many cute things and Liz’s excitement started to rub off on me.
***************************
I was sitting at the island in the kitchen when I heard Asher’s jeep pull up. I had been trying to read, but my mind was so busy going over all the outcomes of the news I was getting ready to announce, that I ended up reading the same page about five times already. The minute that Asher walked through the door, I wanted to throw up. That had never happened before. Normally when he walked through the door, I wanted throw myself at him. My stomach was in knots, and I was having difficult time breathing.
“Hey, baby,” he said as he walked to me, kissing my forehead. “What’s wrong?” he asked, and I started to tell him, but then I smelled nothing but the paint that was splattered on his clothes. I ran to the bathroom. Apparently, the baby didn’t like that smell. My hair was lifted out of my face and off my neck and then a cold cloth was laid there. “Feel better?”