With Archer’s blatant attempts to “woo” me, I would have thought he’d have a dozen stashed in a dozen different places, all within arm’s reach at any given time. Why was he acting like he didn’t have a goddamn clue where one condom was?
“Shit,” he cursed under his breath.
“What?”
He upended his shower bag, shaking loose the last few contents. No small plastic squares floated out. “Shit.”
Sitting up in bed, I inspected the mess he’d made ripping his suitcase apart. “You can’t say shit twice and not fill the naked woman in the room in on why you’re saying that.”
His hands combed through his hair as he turned in a circle like he was looking for something. “Condoms.”
“Yeah. I’ve heard of them.”
His gaze landed on me. “I don’t have any.”
I swallowed. “Shit.”
“My word exactly.”
Now it was me digging around in the nightstand drawer, shaking the bible out just to make sure there wasn’t one hiding in the pages. You know, since so many people probably used a condom as a bookmark while they were reading the good word at night. “Are you sure? I mean, you’re Luke Archer. I thought you’d be on an automatic refill program or something. You know, where they drop a cargo box out of the air every month.”
A dark brow lifted at me. “I’m sure. Do you have one?”
“Yeah, right here in my back pocket,” I said, patting my bare backside. “Oh, wait.”
“You’re telling me you don’t have a condom in that giant magic bag of yours?” Archer paced over to my duffel bag.
“Oddly enough, that kind of protection doesn’t fall under my job duties.”
He groaned like my answer was causing physical pain. “I could run out and get a box.”
My head whipped with a firm no. “You are not supposed to be running anywhere. If anyone on the team saw you, they’d string me up.” He shouldn’t even be on his feet right now, pacing around like a crazed man desperate to unearth some condom cache. “Plus, I’m on the shot, so if you’re worried about getting me pregnant, I’m covered.” I cleared my throat. “In case you’re worried about anything else, I’m good there too.”
Archer’s hands went to his hips, still pacing the room. “Yeah, yeah, I’m set there too, but I want to be careful. It shouldn’t just be up to the woman to take care of birth control.”
I sat up straighter. “Wow. You are oddly progressive for being such a Neanderthal.”
“I could call Reynolds.” He was already moving for his cell phone on top of the desk. “He has those things coming out of his ears.”
“Yeah, because that would be a great idea.” I deepened my voice a few notes before continuing, “Hey, Reynolds, can I borrow a condom when the only woman in my room right now is the team’s athletic trainer?”
“That would imply that Reynolds has the mental capacity to put one and one together.”
I gave that a moment’s thought then shrugged. “Good point. Give him a call.”
“No, you’re right.” Archer’s head shook, sending his damp hair spilling across his forehead. “He’d suspect something.”
He got back to pacing in all his glorious naked and ready glory, making a frustrated groan erupt from my chest. “Are you serious right now, Archer? You’ve been doing everything short of groveling at my feet to get me into bed, and now that I’m in it, you don’t have any condoms?”
A pained look broke across his face when he took in the view of me lounging on his bed. “I didn’t actually think you’d agree.”
“So why all of the effort if you didn’t think I’d eventually go against my better judgment and fall into bed with you?”
His eyes landed on mine from across the room. “Because I go after what I want, no matter the likelihood or, in your case, unlikelihood of it happening.”
“Admirable. Even a little romantic.” I tipped my head at him. “Except for your lack of planning and preparation.” I motioned between him and me, an entire room keeping us apart thanks to one missing piece of latex.
Suddenly, Archer’s face flattened like he was remembering something, and he bounded across the room. He pulled his wallet out of his coat pocket and shook it. Black shiny credit cards and large bills tumbled to the ground right before his face lit up. He pulled something from a small pocket.
“Fuck yes, I have one. I forgot all about it.” His wallet dropped to the floor, his hand clutching the condom like it was a priceless artifact thrust into the air. A moment later, his forehead creased. “These things come with an expiration date though, right?” He lowered the condom so it was in front of his eyes, the skin between his brows creasing.
“Yeah,” I said slowly. “So if you bought them in the Cretaceous Period, you might want to toss it out.”
“Okay, no, we’re good.” His eyes squinted a little more as he read something on the wrapper. “At least for another month.”
At the same time my body relaxed with relief knowing we’d be able to have sex soon, it tensed with nervousness at the same realization. “Why is the only condom Luke Archer has on him is about to expire?”
“It’s been a while.” The torn wrapper was already on the floor as he moved back toward the bed, the condom rolling into place down his hard length.