At noon the place had cleared out, and Amos announced that he was going to the café to buy lunch for all three of them and asked Cricket what she wanted on her burger.
“Mayo, no pickles or onions, and tots instead of fries,” she said.
“Same here,” Jennie Sue said from the other side of the first row of shelving. “And I’ll just have sweet tea from the fridge here, so you don’t have to carry so much.”
When Amos was out of the store, Cricket called out, “Thank you, Jennie Sue.”
Jennie Sue rounded the end of the bookshelf and sat down on the sofa. “Did it hurt to say those words? Do you need a pain pill?”
“More than you’ll ever know,” Cricket admitted.
“Why do you hate me?”
“Hate is too strong a word for what I feel for you, Jennie Sue.”
“Then what is it?”
Cricket inhaled deeply and let it out slowly. “I don’t know. Maybe I wanted all that acceptance you always had when we were growing up. You fit in and I didn’t.”
“You may have thought so, but I always felt like an outsider with every group,” Jennie Sue said. “Did I ever tell you that I loved it when your mama brought chocolate cupcakes to our class parties? I’d really like to have her recipe for that icing. It was like a layer of fudge resting on the top of the cupcakes.”
Cricket slowly shook her head. “That recipe is in the church cookbook now. They were homemade. I loved the ones that your mama sent to the class. Those ones from the bakery looked so pretty. My mama’s were so plain.”
“But they tasted so much better than the bought ones. Think we’ll ever be able to be friends?”
Another shake of the head. “Probably not, but I don’t dislike you as much as I did last week.”
“I guess that’s a step in the right direction,” Jennie Sue said.
“Rick says that I’m too blunt.”
“He’s right,” Jennie Sue agreed. “But then there is an upside to that. A person knows where they stand with you.”
“Do you always have to say something positive? It makes it real hard to hate you,” Cricket sighed.
Before Jennie Sue could answer, Amos backed through the front door with a brown bag. “After we eat, I’m going to drive over to Abilene and visit my brother the rest of today and tonight. I’ll leave the keys on the counter, Jennie Sue, so you can lock up and open up in the morning,” Amos said. “I’m likin’ having someone three days a week. Gives me time to enjoy retirement.”
Retirement was something in the far future for Jennie Sue, and only if she could find a job that paid well with good benefits. But change happened and couldn’t be helped.
With wet dirt clinging to her feet that evening after supper, Jennie Sue picked green beans from vines that Rick had trained up a trellis. A hot breeze ruffled the leaves on the cornstalks, and carried Rick’s humming to her ears. Then suddenly the stalks parted and his face appeared about three feet away.
The setting sun lit up the scar on his jaw, and his hand went to it when he caught her staring.
“It’s ugly, I know,” he said.
“I don’t think so.” She took a step forward and touched it.
“Well, you are probably the only one who thinks that way.” He stepped out and sat down on a narrow strip of dirt separating the beans and corn. “Let’s take a little break. My basket is full and yours is almost overflowing.”
She sat down beside him. “Did you hate coming back here to farm?”
He shrugged. “I didn’t have a choice.”
“Surely there was something else,” she said.
“Maybe being a security guard, but even that was iffy with this limp. What about you, Jennie Sue? What are you doing back here?”
“Trying to talk my dad into giving me a job at the company, but I’m not having much luck. Whatever happened ended your career, right?” she asked.
His eyes remained fixed somewhere out there near the sunset. “Yes, it did. I was treated, discharged, and released. I’ve questioned God for letting that happen to me. Twenty more steps and I’d have been in the helicopter and safe with the rest of the team. But half a step back and I would have been sent home in pieces.” He still focused on something far away.
“I’ve done the same thing, but we both know that it’s not God’s fault. We just needed someone to blame.” She wondered if he was seeing the whole thing again, reliving it, probably not for the first time.
Rick jerked his head around to look at her. “What are you blaming him for?”
“Letting me be sold off like a bag of chicken feed, for one thing.”
“What?” Rick frowned.
She told him what her father had told her about Percy and the dowry. “No one knows that, so I’d rather you kept it a secret. It makes me feel cheap and dirty.”
Rick reached across the distance and laid a hand on her shoulder. There was that chemistry—electricity, vibes, or whatever folks called it—again.
“You should never feel like that, Jennie Sue.” His drawl softened. “You are an amazing woman any guy would be lucky to have beside him. Percy should be shot.”
“I really don’t care anymore. I’m pretty much indifferent to him. If they catch him, then he can pay the consequences. If they don’t, then he’ll be looking over his shoulder the rest of his life,” she said.
“So have you forgiven your mother?”
“Not yet, but I’m workin’ on it. If I can’t forgive her, then it’ll sit on my heart the rest of my life. I don’t want anyone, not even my mother, to have that kind of power over me.” She covered his hand with hers. “I’m glad you survived.”
“Well, I’m glad that I survived, too.” He nodded. “Because I get to sit in this garden with you, and we can be friends.” He cocked his head to one side. “What do you really want in life, Jennie Sue?”
“Right now? Tomorrow or five years down the road?” she answered with more questions.
“All of the above,” Rick answered.
“Right now, to see if Cricket will snap beans tomorrow at the bookstore. We could sell them in quart bags to whoever comes into the store, and it would make her feel productive. Tomorrow—to phone my mother. Five years down the road? That’s too far to think about. What about you?”
“I want a family someday. No hurry, but that’s my long-term goal,” he said.
“Me, too.” She glanced his way to find him staring out across the fields again. She tried to imagine where the rest of his scars were but could only see him as a perfect man in her mind.
“I’ll hate to see you leave Bloom, but I understand. Don’t worry about all the gossip and rumors. Folks are goin’ to talk, and what they think about the way you live your life doesn’t matter.”
He turned quickly and caught her staring. A blush dotted her cheeks, and she blinked. “It’s not a matter of what other people think of me, Rick. It’s what I think of myself, and that’ll take a while to get over, if I ever do.”
His hand went to her shoulder again. “Don’t be so tough on yourself. You’re a victim.”
She slowly lifted her eyes. “What about you? You’re a victim, too.”
He nodded. “That’s what my therapist said in the hospital. But just sayin’ it isn’t like takin’ a pain pill, and it all disappears. I’ve got scars on the outside, and we both have some on the inside. Maybe God slapped us down together in Bloom, Texas, so we could help each other get through the past and move on to the future.”
“I think a good friend is even better than a therapist,” she said.
“Me, too, Jennie Sue.” He nodded. “It’s gettin’ pretty dark. Let’s call it a night. I’ve got plenty for the deliveries tomorrow.”
“You are the boss.”
He stood and stretched out a hand. She put hers in it and imagined him pulling her to his chest, holding her there and maybe even kissing her. The vision made her pulse race a little, but it didn’t happen. Once she was on her feet, he let go of her hand, and they picked up their baskets to carry back to the porch.