“You ready to go inside?” Mom asks, and I pull my eyes from Austin’s as she takes my hand.
“Yep.” I smile down at her, giving her hand a light squeeze, taking some strength from our connection, a reminder of why I’m really here. When I look toward the restaurant, Austin and Anna are walking off in the opposite direction and Rhonda is waiting for us. My excitement about sitting down to a nice meal is gone, replaced with unease. I don’t even know if I taste the salmon tacos I ordered, and I try to smile when appropriate, but for the most part, I sit with a weight in my stomach while looking out at the beautiful view of the harbor, watching as boats come and go.
“I’ll get it,” I say, getting up off the couch when there’s a knock at the door.
“Will you bring me some of those cookies you baked when you come back?” my mom asks from her recliner, where she sat so we could watch a movie.
“Sure.” I smile, running my hand over her hair.
“Hey,” the deep timber of Austin’s voice greets me as I pull the door open to see him standing on the front porch. My heart starts to beat at a faster tempo as I realize he’s in front of me, so close I can smell his warm, masculine sent mixed with the smell of the ocean…so close I could reach out and touch him, if I was brave enough to do so. “Can I talk to you for a minute?” He shoves his hands into his pockets and takes a step back.
Swallowing hard, my eyes scan over him. “Um.” I look over my shoulder, seeing that my mom is still sitting in her chair. “Sure.” I pull my sweater tighter around me as I step out onto the front porch, letting the screen door close behind me. The moment I’m in front of him, I tilt my head back to catch his eyes. He was always much bigger than me, but now his presence seems to tower over me, making me feel small and insignificant. “What’s going on?” I ask, going for casual hoping that he doesn’t notice the way my voice shakes.
“I wanted to come clear the air.”
“Okay,” I reply, wrapping my arms tighter around myself, when all I want to do is touch him in some way to see if he’s real.
“This is a small town, and there is no way we’re not going to end up running into each other from time to time.”
“I know.”
“I know why you’re here, and I know your mom needs you right now, so I don’t want you to feel awkward when we do see each other.”
“Thank you.” I breathe in relief and his eyes drop from mine to my mouth and annoyance fills his features.
“I hate you, Lea,” he says, causing that small glimmer of hope I was feeling to fizzle out and turn my insides dark.
“I’m sorry,” I choke out.
“You fucking killed me when you left, and I will never forgive you for the things you told your mother to tell me after you were gone.” His words barely register over the anguish twisting my gut and the loud slosh of blood pumping through my veins. “Stay out of my way and I’ll stay out of yours.” I nod, because my lungs have closed up on me. “Later,” he says, then disappears into the darkness, leaving me alone as my lungs collapse.
“Who was at the door?” Mom asks as I hand her the plate of cookies she asked for.
“No one important,” I tell her, taking my seat on the couch, pulling my knees up against my chest, and wrapping my arms around them while I stare at the television, not really seeing it wishing I could just disappear.
Chapter 3
Austin
“Josie,” I greet Lea’s mom as she steps from the dock onto my boat. I can’t say that we’ve ever been close; I sure as hell can’t say she’s ever come to see me. Hell, when I was searching for her daughter, I thought at one point she was going to place a restraining order against me.
“Austin,” she says then walks to the wheelhouse, opens the door, and gestures toward it.
Growling, “Fuck,” I follow her inside, letting the door slam behind me. This is not what I fucking wanted to deal with today, not after tossing and turning all night, haunted by the look in Lea’s eyes after I told her I hate her.
“We need to talk,” she states as I cross my arms over my chest and lean back against the control panel.
“Gathered that much, Josie,” I tell her, trying to keep the bite out of my tone, but failing. I thought I was over this shit, but now, after seeing Lea, I realize I’m far from over it; I just tucked it away, and now it’s all bubbling to the surface. Lea is even more beautiful now than she was when we were teens. Her face was still soft and round, her skin still creamy in complexion but her lips seemed fuller. Her body filled out giving her curves in all the right places, curves that any man would beg to study with his hands and mouth. Her brown hair was the kind that you could picture spread out on your pillow or wrapped around your fist., and her eyes, though sad, still held that sparkle of wisdom that called to me. Everything about her spoke to me, but there was no fucking way I would ever go there again no matter how badly my dick disagreed.
“Are you even going to ask what we need to talk about?” Josie asks.
“No, I know what you want to talk to me about, and like I told Lea last night, I know why she’s here, and I’ll stay out of her way, but she needs to stay out of mine.” I feel like an asshole, but this is how it has to be. There’s no other choice.
“That’s very diplomatic of you,” she says sarcastically, making me grit my teeth.