It went against everything I knew, but I fought the panic. Inspecting his head wound to make sure it wasn’t leaking enough fresh blood to be concerning, I came around to his side again. His breathing was a little fast and his color was a couple shades lighter than normal, but otherwise, his injuries didn’t seem life-threatening.
“What are you doing out here, Rowen?” he asked, inspecting my body like I’d just done his.
“I came to find you,” I answered as I wiped the mud from his face with the back of my hand.
“How did you get down here?”
I swallowed and pointed up the cliff face.
His expression went pretty much exactly how I thought it would go: flabbergasted with a trace of outraged. “You realize that’s called Suicide Ridge for a reason, right?”
I crossed my arms and sat up on my heels. I wasn’t there to argue with him. “Do you?”
“Yeah, I do. That’s why I take it seriously when I travel it,” he replied. I couldn’t stop staring at the way his right arm cradled his left arm.
“And you call it ‘taking it seriously’ when you decided to travel it in the middle of the night during the storm of the century?” Why was I still arguing with him? Really, all I’d wanted to do since I’d stumbled over him was kiss him hard on the mouth and cuddle close until help came.
“It is when you see the calf everyone’s been looking for at the bottom of the ravine.” Jesse tilted his head toward the big shrub. I hadn’t noticed at first, but a tiny black calf was laying under the shelter of the bush. She was as wet and muddy as the rest of us but resting as peacefully as I’d ever seen an animal sleep.
“You broke your arm, your ribs, and your damn head to save a baby cow?” I said, waving my hands at the calf.
“I wasn’t planning on breaking anything when I climbed down to get her,” he said. “But the mud, my balance, and my feet had other plans.”
“What were you doing out here on your own in the first place? What were you thinking when you tried coming down that thing”—I waved at the steep wall in front of us—“in those boots?” I flailed at his feet next. “I have four-inch heels with better traction than those things!”
Jesse looked like he was fighting a grin. A second later, all humor left his face. “I am not answering another question until you tell me what you were thinking coming out here on your own. What you were thinking climbing down that thing in those things?” His pointed from the cliff to my boots. “And . . . and . . . how did you get here in the first place?”
I doubted my answer would put him any more at ease. “Sunny.” I shrugged.
Nope, it definitely didn’t put him at ease. It put him the opposite. “Sunny?!” He tried sitting up more, but he only made it a couple inches before grimacing.
“Would you lie back and take it easy?” I said. “Before you break or bust something else?”
He didn’t right away, but Jesse eventually settled back against the rock. I zipped out of the rain jacket and wadded it into a makeshift pillow.
“Rowen,” he said, shaking his head, “put that back on right now. Don’t be crazy.”
“Jesse,” I rolled my eyes and carefully stuffed it behind his head, “don’t you be crazy. And don’t tell me what to do.” I rested my hand on the side of his neck, and even in the cold of the night and with the rain coating our skin, I felt the heat charging through our touch.
“Anything else?” he asked as he settled into the raincoat pillow.
“Yeah,” I said, lowering my face over his. “Stop pretending like what I did was insane. Stop pretending you wouldn’t have done the exact same thing if our roles were reversed.”
Jesse’s good arm lifted and his hand cradled my face. “That it?”
“No.” I shook my head. “Stop pretending like you’re mad at me because you suck at it.”
A chuckle rushed out of his mouth. “I suppose I do.” His thumb skimmed my cheek and, just like every other touch shared with Jesse, I melted into it. “But, Rowen, the guys would have found me. It wouldn’t have taken them much longer. Why did you risk your life to find me first?”
A hundred reasons. A thousand explanations. I’d do it a million times over.
“I’m working on that whole healthy thing.”
Jesse mirrored the smile on my face. “How is almost killing yourself healthy?”
I glanced over my shoulder, then back at him. “Because I’m here with you now.”
“Is this the same girl who pushed me away, ran away, and was so hung up on the deserve-don’t-deserve thing?”
“It’s the same girl. It’s just the same girl who let a few wise words from a couple wise people set in. The same girl who let a few of her own realizations set in.” I lowered my forehead to his, shielding us both from the storm. “Because I love you, Jesse. I know that I will love you more than any other person in the world ever could. Because you were right. Deserving has nothing to do with loving someone. I’m grabbing hold of what I want and not looking back.”
Jesse’s eyes stared into mine and they were as light as I’d seen them. “That sounds like a person who’s gotten past her ‘deserve’ hang up.”
I smiled. “Well, even if I haven’t gotten all the way past it, I figured this whole saving your life thing was a step in the right direction.” Jesse laughed, then winced. Apparently broken ribs and laughter didn’t go well together. “So? Am I forgiven?”