She scoffed at me but I could see my words made her uneasy. “What does it mean?”
I narrowed my eyes the slightest bit and exhaled slowly. She made it hard to breathe in the best way. “It means forever.”
Something that looked like fear flashed across her gaze and the angry storm was back swirling at the center. “Forever doesn’t seem to last very long in the Point.”
“Forever is what you make of it.” Forever could be a lifetime trying to right a wrong and wasting a life because you were filled with vengeance and hate, or it could be a youth wasted because of other people’s ideals and beliefs. It could be a single second with the right person or an eternity lost chasing the wrong one.
She rolled her eyes at me and scooted around to where I was standing in the center of the kitchen. “This is going to end so badly between us, Nassir. You’re going to have to share everything you’ve pillaged and plundered over the years and you’re going to hate me for it. I want to get my hands on all of your shiny toys.”
I lifted an eyebrow at her.
“Thinking about it ending in any way, shape, or form means you’re admitting something finally started, and that’s all I care about. I can learn to share, Key.” It might take some time. I was used to be being greedy and selfish with my things and with my time.
She tucked the longer part of her hair back behind her ear and muttered, “I’ll believe it when I see it, Gates.” Her eyes darted around the kitchen and landed on the massive double doors that led to the back deck that virtually hung off the side of the mountain we were perched on. “Why do you live in a cabin out in the middle of the woods? I mean it’s obviously more than a cabin, but seriously? A log house in the sticks? What’s up with that?”
I turned my back on her and walked to the fridge to get a bottle of water. “It’s the last place on earth anyone would ever look for me. Kind of like you in that diner.” And that was the God’s honest truth. “I have a suite built into the back of my office in the club so I can stay in the city if I need to, but this is home.”
“It’s beautiful, but not what I expected.”
I thought the same thing about her time and time again. “Make yourself at home. Bayla keeps the pantry stocked, and the rest of your stuff including your car will be here in a few days. If you need anything in the meantime, just ask.”
Her eyes snapped back to mine and I saw a pink stain start to spread across her high cheekbones.
“She lives here with you?”
It took me a second to understand who the “she” was that Key was talking about.
“Bayla? No. I live alone, but I work a lot and keep odd hours. This is a big house, so someone needs to look after it. She comes and goes as she pleases.” I wondered if the heat I had seen on her face could be attributed to jealousy. That idea made my dick even harder than it already was. “Why?”
I would rather have all my teeth yanked out of my face with rusty pliers than tell her that Bayla had indeed been in my bed more often than not. Key was no fool, so she knew I had spent lots and lots of time with beautiful women over the years, but having the evidence of that right in front of her while I was trying to tie her to me with unbreakable chains wasn’t in my best interests.
“Don’t be ridiculous. I have watched you fuck your way through every pretty girl that happened across your path for years. You might’ve had your attention on them from time to time, but you were always looking at me.” It was arrogant and made her sound so sure of herself, but she wasn’t wrong, so I didn’t argue.
“I not only looked at you, I always saw you.” And I had. I saw the young girl scared but determined to take her clothes off so she could have something more later on down the line. I saw the young woman coming into her own as she realized she could use her looks and her body to rule her world and to control the people around her. I watched the woman she was now, back where she belonged and ready to usher her broken city into something new, something fierce and formidable.
She cocked her head to the side and regarded me solemnly for a long, quiet minute. “I’ve always seen you too, Nassir. I know who you really are.”
I wanted to laugh. No, she didn’t. No one did, not even Chuck, and he had almost all the gory details of my past festering and seething somewhere in his memory bank.
“Who am I, Key? Who do you really think I am?” The words sounded harsh and rumbled out from a place deep inside of my soul. Maybe if she could answer that question, I could finally have some peace. Maybe I could forget the horrible things I had done and the horrible things I was bound to keep on doing to keep my throne.
Calmly and totally serious she told me, “You’re the opposite of a good man, Nassir, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t my man.” Her stormy eyes flashed at me. “You’re my man, and my devil . . . it depends on the day.”
I didn’t get a chance to respond because she turned on her heel and glided out of the kitchen. Even if I had had time to fire something back at her, I wasn’t sure there was anything to say. She was right. I was the devil. I made bargains for souls that weren’t mine and I played with fire every single time I stepped foot in the Point. Sins and vices were my playthings and punishment was second nature to me. Suffering felt like old hat and I was pretty sure any soul I might still have left after the life I had led before was now tainted with so much soot and blackness that there was no way it could ever come clean. She saw that part of me and she was still here.