I wanted to curse at her. She hurt me, and I was supposed to feel sorry for her? "Give me a break."
She gasped. Her eyes were wide once again. She visibly swallowed, clinging to her boyfriend's hand.
I shook my head. All the hurt and anger, I needed it out of me. I already had so much for Analise. I didn't need any more. It needed to be gone. But I couldn't deny what I felt. "You're not nothing. You've never been nothing. You were the only friend I had, even before I started dating Mason."
"You had me," Adam spoke up.
I snorted at him. "Really?"
He flashed me a tight grin. "Shutting up. This isn't about me."
"Thank you."
More tears had fallen over Becky's face, but she ignored them. "I'm really sorry, Sam. I really am. I was so stupid, and I was hurt."
"Why?" That made no sense.
"Because I felt left out. I knew you were close to the Kades, but it wasn't until that last party when I realized how tight you were with them. I mean, hello. Mason Kade is fighting for you, and then Logan snubs Lydia f for you. She came onto him and he smacked her back and for what? For you. Those two care so much about you and when you're with them, it's like no one else matters except you three. You never even invited me to your home before, like I wasn't good enough or something."
"The four of them."
"What?" She looked at Adam.
He stiffened. "The four of them. Nate Monson's in there too."
"Oh yeah. I know, but he wasn't always around then. But that too. Look at this place. You're living at his house. He moved back, and now you're here with them. It's the four of you guys again."
I didn't know what to say. A part of me didn't care anymore. Her feelings were hurt? Well, she'd gotten me back. Good for her.
Becky hadn't stopped crying. Her boyfriend raised his skinny hand and wiped a few tears away. His thumb caressed her cheek and skimmed under her eye. The touch was gentle and loving. She was with someone who loved her. I could tell, just from watching him. I drew in an anguished breath. Becky was dating someone. She had someone who loved her. It started to really dawn on me. She had met a boy, dated a boy, had more dates with him, and hadn't told me. That was my job as her friend—I felt robbed of that.
I closed my eyes and turned away. I knew what I needed to do and it hurt. But it needed to be done.
"Sam?" Her voice dropped to a hoarse whisper. "Can you please forgive me? I'm sorry. I'm really sorry for believing Adam's lies."
I shook my head. I needed to forgive her and I knew I would, but she needed to realize something. I looked up with a tear in my own eye. "You wanted to believe him."
She flinched, like I had slapped her.
I pressed, "I didn't leave you behind. I didn't laugh at you behind your back. I wasn't using you. And you knew all of that, but you wanted to believe Adam's lie even when you knew it wasn't true. I think you did it because you were mad at me."
"But—" Her mouth hung open.
Adam frowned. "Why would she be mad at you?"
I shrugged, though my eyes never left hers. Then I saw it. Guilt. When her head went back down, I knew I'd been right. "She was mad at me because I had what she wanted. You were jealous, weren't you?"
Her head nodded up and down, but she didn't say a word.
"I had what you wanted, didn't I?"
As she looked back up, the anguish was all over her. More tears flooded her, her mouth was turned down in a frown, and she shook her head. "I'm so stupid, right? You went to the top, Sam. You got the guys that no one could get. I mean, you got both of them. Logan Kade worships the ground you walk on. You got what everyone wanted, not just me. Can you blame me for being jealous? Isn't that a human thing for me to do? To be jealous?" A sickened laugh bubbled out of her. "Yeah, I was mad at you. Yeah, I was jealous of you, but I was your friend. I'm sorry that I let myself believe Adam's lie. It was horrible of me. I know that and I really regret it. I really do, Sam. I really really do."
My heart sank with each word she said, but I couldn't argue with them. I knew there were more girls, a lot more, that felt the same as she did. Who was I to be taken in by the Kades? What was so special about me? I knew Becky wouldn't voice those questions to me. I knew she might never want to admit to those thoughts, but they were there. I had them too.
"This is bullshit," Adam cursed behind me. He moved next to me with disgust. "This is about the Kades? Again? Are you serious?"
Becky covered her mouth with her hand. More whimpers escaped her, and then she turned to her boyfriend. His arms came around her, and he patted the back of her head as he shot Adam a dark look. "Man. Respect it."
Adam rolled his eyes. "I'm so sick of this. Can we not have one night without talking about them?"
I hissed at him, "You're not helping."
He threw up his hands. "I'm not trying anymore. I didn't know all this boiled down to those guys again. What's so damn special about them? Their looks? I'm good looking. That they're athletic? I'm the freaking quarterback for FCA. I was the quarterback. Whatever! What's so damn special about them?"
Raz spoke up, "Dude, they're legends. Legit and smack dab. Legends, dude. That's all. Legends."
Adam snorted. "This is ridiculous." He turned to me, frustrated. "Are you okay?"