Home > Filthy English (English #2)(14)

Filthy English (English #2)(14)
Author: Ilsa Madden-Mills

“I wasn’t acting. This has nothing to do with the bet.”

He clapped me on the back. “Such an optimist. I like that about you. It gives you a certain, oh, innocence that in the end only adds to your many attributes. I can honestly see why women drop at your feet, but sometimes, cousin, you just have to admit that the game is over and the chick just isn’t that into you. Checkmate. I win.”

“She used to be into me.”

“Till you broke her heart.” He grinned and ruffled my hair. “Bloody hell, it feels great to beat your arse. Let’s do another wager.”

As he nattered on about bets and pounds, I kept my eyes on Remi, watching as she applied red lipstick and ran quick fingers through her disheveled hair.

She’d hadn’t even said goodbye, and she made it clear she didn’t want to be my friend. But as I watched her not watching me, I took in the strained lines around her eyes.

“Oi, are you listening to me?” Spider asked.

“No.”

“Why the bloody hell not? I’m taking sporting bets here, and you’re off in la-la land. You haven’t gotten into my hash have you? Come on, let’s get a drink or hit the kebab place across the street. Loser has to pay though.” He smirked. “That’s you.”

“Yeah,” I murmured, but I was only half listening.

Remi must have felt the weight of my stare because she glanced up and our eyes met and clung to each other. My pulse kicked up, and in that moment I wanted to stay with her.

You can’t.

But . . .

“It’s not over yet,” I muttered under my breath as we walked away.

DAX AND SPIDER walked away and headed toward the stairs. I watched his broad shoulders disappear until he was swallowed by the crowd.

My pounding heart finally relaxed.

God help me.

I’d kissed the boy I’d loved; the boy who’d ripped my heart out and then tossed it away like some forgotten thing. I’d inhaled his intoxicating scent and talked to him face to face. Something I’d sworn I’d never do again.

The fear on his face when he’d asked if I’d been in love with him had reiterated everything I suspected about him. His heart was locked away, enclosed in an impenetrable castle.

I had to protect myself from him.

The thing is, Dax is a temporary guy and I’m a forever girl, and the two didn’t go together. Ever.

I closed my eyes, remembering the dark place he’d put me in three years ago and the secret I’d kept from him.

I opened my eyes to see Lulu watching me, her eyes soft with concern. She sat next to me in the booth and gave my shoulder a squeeze. “You feeling okay?”

I nodded. “Good.”

“Uh-huh. So, question . . . how on earth did you end up with Dax and the blue-haired guy? There’s got to be a good story there.”

“I tripped and fell in his lap. I—I didn’t know who he was.”

“And?” she said.

“One thing led to another . . . we kissed.” I exhaled. “It was amazing—as usual.”

Her green eyes widened. “Shit.”

“Yeah, mega shit,” I mumbled.

“No wonder you’re white as a ghost.”

I nodded, filling her in on the details of him carting me upstairs.

She took a sip of her drink, eyes watchful as they raked over me. “Did I do the right thing by being a bitch and sending him away? ’Cause I gotta tell ya, you looked a bit conflicted for a moment.”

I had?

She snorted. “God, I wish Hartford could have seen him kiss you though. He’d have pissed his pants. Dax Blay, the most popular Tau ever, making out with his ex-fiancée.”

Hartford.

A pang struck, right in the center of my chest. Another failure. I was zero for two when it came to love.

And with that thought in mind, I checked my phone to see if Hartford had called. We hadn’t had any communication since Mario’s.

“Any messages?” Lulu asked.

I sighed, scrolling through my texts. “Just Mom. She wants me to come home and beg Hartford to take me back.”

“And miss this fantastic country? You deserve this vacation, Remi.”

I took a sip of water and set it down, carefully choosing my words. “I’ve been thinking. Do you think that if I loved Hartford enough, I’d give him the break he wanted and just wait for him to figure us out?”

She scrunched her nose as if she smelled something bad. “You aren’t exactly the type of girl who swallows her pride and waits for a guy to make up his mind. You’re strong and independent. Once they hurt you, you tend to distance yourself.”

I nodded, taking that in. “But did you ever think I was, I don’t know, settling because Hartford fit my plan: dependable, low-risk . . .”

“Girl, only you can answer that.”

I leaned my head back against the seat, my eyes searching the club for Dax. “Dax certainly isn’t low-risk.”

Lulu’s eyebrows rose. “He may be hotter than a cow brander, but he broke you, Remi.” She glanced over my shoulder and clapped. “Speaking of walking orgasms, here come the guys I was telling you about.”

The two Brits she’d danced with earlier came over to our booth with big smiles. Both were grunge types with dark jeans and heavy, silver jewelry. Not my type.

So. You just need to have fun, I reminded myself.

Lulu directed the taller one with a Mohawk to sit next to me while the darker-haired smaller one sat next to Lulu.

   
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