I cried. That was all I could do.
And Brian held me through it all.
“I’m sorry. Wild, I’m so sorry,” he told me over and over, soothing me with his voice and with his arms holding tight.
Sir tried digging between us at one point but we were one, fused together. Nothing was penetrating.
Our love grew stronger in those minutes.
I felt movement at the foot of the bed as Sir settled there. He gave up. He was smart doing that.
I burrowed deeper into my boy’s heartbeat.
“I meant everything I said,” I sobbed into his chest. “Everything. You and Tori, everyone I’ve met here, you are the most important people to me.”
He rubbed my back.
“Even Jamie. I’m really rooting for him.”
“He knows, babe. He appreciates it.”
I quickly composed myself and leaned away.
“I want to start having family dinners on Sundays,” I informed Brian, watching his eyes flick wider. “I’ll cook. Everyone can bring a side dish or beverages if they’d like, but it’s not required. We have a large table and I’d like to utilize that, although we’ll need more chairs. What’s your sister’s work schedule like?”
He stared at me for a moment before responding.
“Babe.”
“Mm?”
“You sure you wanna be talking about this right now?”
I sniffed and wiped away a lonely tear.
“Yes. I’d very much like to talk about this right now,” I replied a little curtly. “Why wouldn’t I?”
“Considering you’ve just had a conversation that didn’t end so well and you’ve been crying in my arms for a solid thirty, I’m thinking this might not be the best time to lock down weekly plans that involve a solid commitment from you in terms of cooking.”
I tipped my chin up.
“I’m not sure what you mean exactly, but if you’re trying to say I’m not in a right frame of mind to guarantee delicious meals for the people I love, I suggest you carve some time out of your schedule and get to know me a little better. Even in times of distress, I know what’s most important, Trouble.”
His lip twitched.
“Sounds good,” he mumbled, giving me a squeeze. “Feel like I know you, but I’m all for carving out more time and digging a little deeper, Wild.” He kissed my forehead.
I moaned and melted closer.
He was right. That did sound good.
“Jenna’s off on weekends,” he said.
“That’s good,” I replied, turning my head and resting my cheek against his chest. “I really want her and the twins there whenever they can make it.”
“I’ll make sure to tell her.”
“Tomorrow. Give her enough notice. And the guys. I’ll handle getting the word out to the girls.”
A laugh rumbled behind his ribs.
“Whatever you want, babe,” he said, so much meaning behind those words, they fought off my sadness.
Brian settled, sat his chin on top of my head, draped his leg over both of mine, and locked me against him like he always did when we lay facing each other.
I yawned, sleepy sighed, and wrapped my hand around his back.
“You okay?” he asked, moving his fingers through my hair.
I closed my eyes.
I wasn’t sure if I had a mom anymore, but I had Brian. I had family. I had love.
If I wasn’t okay, I knew I would be.
Tipping my head back, I kissed the underside of his jaw, flattened my cheek to his chest, closed my eyes again, and within seconds fell fast asleep, clinging to love and the assurance everything would be okay.
Chapter Nineteen
BRIAN
I thought I was protecting her.
I thought if I kept Syd ignorant to the dirty deeds of my past, we’d be untouchable, growing in love and building on the future I wanted us to have, the one I wanted to give her.
I was a fucking moron.
I thought I was protecting her.
But in the end I destroyed everything we’d ever have.
Chapter Twenty
SYDNEY
One Month Later
I was standing at the kitchen island crushing up Doritos in a Ziploc bag while humming along to “Suspicious Minds” as it played through my one earbud, my other ear going without the soothing voice of the King since I didn’t want to risk missing the timer on the oven and burning my Mexican Chicken Bake, another new recipe I was trying out for Sunday family dinner.
This would be our fourth one. Meaning this was the fourth new recipe I was experimenting with and testing out on our friends.
It was a risk not sticking to the familiar since I was feeding such a large group, but it was paying off. The past three recipes had all been highly praised and devoured by everyone, meaning the number of recipes I was now comfortable making had doubled since moving to Dogwood.
I had high hopes for the Mexican Chicken Bake.
Not only because of my track record but also because of the delicious aroma coming from the oven as the chicken was baking, and according to reviews, it was an excellent meal to cook ahead of time and warm in the oven when you were ready to consume it.
That was why I chose it for today and why I was cooking it four hours before everyone was due to come over.
Brian and I had plans this afternoon. Important plans. Plans I wouldn’t miss for the world or take any time away from because I had to get home and make a meal.
For the first time in five months, my boy was getting back out on the water.