Chloe opened her hand, revealing the little, white pill that sat perfectly in the middle of her palm. Swiftly, she popped the pill into her mouth before swallowing, hoping it would work quickly.
“I was in a car wreck; that’s all I know. I was in a car wreck. No one hurt me.”
* * *
It wasn’t long before her father’s medicine visits to her room were few and far between. Each time he came in, he was ruder and more drunk than the last visit. Chloe had to learn to deal with the pain on her own as she was slowly weaned off the pills. She didn’t know what she dreaded more: a train full of emotions hitting her when the medicine had run its course or her father walking through the door again. It was a flip of a coin which one was worse. They both gave her nightmares.
Something about her was broken, and those pills weren’t putting her back together. Instead, they just acted like a Band-Aid, a temporary fix not to feel the emotions that were killing her. The Band-Aid wasn’t healing her; it was causing her to rot from the inside out. Deep down, she knew this. She could feel it the moment her last dosage wore off, and that was when she made a decision.
The turning of the doorknob had Chloe jumping up in bed.
Maxwell entered the room in a jumbled mess, reeking of alcohol. Coming over, he practically threw the medicine bottle at her.
Chloe kept her head down as she said, “I-I d-don’t want them a-anymore.”
“Ex … cu-u-use me?”
Swallowing down the bile that rose in her throat, she said it again. “I d-don’t want them anymore.”
He stared at her a minute before he responded, “Then … if you don’t need them-m anymore, your ass-s-s can go back to s-s-school.”
She gasped, finally raising her head to look at him. “P-Please don’t make me go back!”
“Yes …”
“No!” She couldn’t help crying.
Maxwell pointed his finger right in her face, frightening her into thinking he was going to grab her. “Don’t you ever … speak to me that way again lit-t-tle girl.” He snatched up the medicine bottle forcefully off the bed. “Now you’re fucking going to s-s-school tomorrow. You were just in a damn wreck …, rem-m-member?”
Chloe didn’t even hear the door close behind him. She sat there all night, holding herself tightly.
Her father used to be her only source of love and trust. Now he scared the daylights out of her. After her “accident,” it was evident she wasn’t the only person who had changed.
Now, if her home life wasn’t fucked up enough, she had to go back to the outside world. Not only had she not left the house, but she hadn’t even left her bedroom. Now she was going to be thrown right back into high school like nothing had even happened.
When morning came, Chloe headed to her bathroom. One look at herself in the mirror and she knew exactly how the kids at school were going to treat her.
Does the sight of her just sicken you?
She remembered how she had used to look just a short time ago. She used to think of herself as pretty.
How does the sight of her look to you now?
Now all she could see was the ugliness that had touched her.
Five
The One Word That Would Follow Her Forever: “Freak.”
Elaine had dropped her off at school, not an ounce of sympathy in her eyes as she shooed Chloe out of the car so that she would not be late for work. There wasn’t a point in pleading not to walk in those front doors with her. She preferred the jungle of Legacy Prep High over being in the car with her, anyway.
As Chloe walked to the front doors of the school, it was a lot for a fourteen-year-old to handle, especially considering what she had gone through since the last time she had walked through those doors. The last time she had passed that doorframe, she not only had looked like a different person, but she had been a different person. The person she was now was unrecognizable.
Maybe it won’t be so bad.
Swallowing hard and finally mustering up the courage to open the door, she passed through the entrance. She hoped her new markings would just gain some sort of sympathy, enough to just be left alone. That was all she asked for.
Pulling the sleeves down on her black sweater to cover the tops of her hands, she started walking down the hall. Her heart stopped instantaneously as a wave of silence slowly traveled down the hall. What was once a noisy, shuffling of feet and smashing lockers accompanied by loud gossip and chatter had now become so quiet you could hear a pin drop.
She had known she would be stared at. Let them get it out of their system. Then it will all be over.
She had to remind herself to put one step in front of the other and focus on reaching the classroom door as the whispering started in another wave down the hall. Regardless, Chloe couldn’t make out anything that was said … until she heard it—the one word that would follow her forever: “freak.”
Chloe hung her head to the ground, letting her long, black, silky hair sweep across her face to cover her scars and shame.
The chuckling from the loudly voiced word began to travel down the hall. She knew who had said it. The certain blonde had just signed Chloe’s death sentence. It was a joke for her to think it would all be over soon, the remains of the once very naive little girl.
It felt like an eternity before she reached her classroom where she carefully took a seat in the back. She held her head down as the students filed in, whispering the moment they saw her. Chloe even continued to hold her head down as class started. It wasn’t until she heard the classroom door squeak open and complete silence fill the room that she looked up.