He walked over toward the couch and sat down next to her. “Baby, I know I leave you alone a lot. I’m sorry about that. I’ll try to be a better boyfriend.”
“Oh my gosh, please stop. Are you kidding me? You are not a bad boyfriend. You work hard and I totally understand. I don’t care that you’re gone. I’m not alone, or lonely or sad or anything. I’m fine. Seriously, I’m the one who’s sorry. Forgive me?” Caroline asked sincerely. What kind of girlfriend forgets to tell her own boyfriend something as important as that? The kind who has her priorities all screwed up. Caroline’s stomach clenched as the guilt set in again.
“Forgiven.” Clay smiled and kissed her lips. “Congratulations on the promotion. You deserve it.”
“Thanks, baby,” she said, while looking into his hazel eyes.
Chapter Seven
Bailey stood inside Caroline’s work cubicle and practically shouted, “So you didn’t even tell him?”
Caroline shushed her friend and whispered, “I told Jackson. But I didn’t even tell my own boyfriend.”
“Shut.Up.” Bailey said, all overly dramatic.
“I’m not kidding. I never freaking told Clay,” Caroline continued, “and the worst part…”
“There’s a worse part?” Bailey interrupted.
Caroline glared at her. “I thought I told him. I didn’t even realize I hadn’t.”
“That is a worse part,” Bailey agreed.
“And then he tried to apologize.”
“Of course he did,” her eyes rolled.
“This is serious!” Caroline raised her voice in frustration.
Bailey’s voice softened somewhat. “Okay. What the hell did he apologize for?”
“For being a bad boyfriend…because he’s always working.”
“Are you kidding me? What is this guy? A freaking saint?”
“Pretty much.” Caroline looked into Bailey’s bright blue eyes and asked, “What the hell is wrong with me?”
Bailey laughed and pretended to count on her fingers. “Where should I start?”
Caroline let out a huff. “Bails, seriously. What is wrong with me? What am I doing?”
“Nothing’s wrong with you,” she responded sternly.
“Then why am I talking to some other guy when I’m currently dating a saint?”
“Maybe sainthood isn’t as appealing as it once was.”
“Do you think that’s it?” Caroline’s head spun. Thoughts came at her with warp speed. “No, of course that’s not it. I mean, I love Clay.”
Bailey put her hands on top of Caroline’s and gave them a friendly squeeze. “Maybe it’s not enough any more?”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m not saying anything. You are.”
Caroline shooed Bailey away and sent a text message to Tracey. “I need to talk to you. Call me when you have a sec.”
“Having dinner at my mom’s tonight. I’ll call you when I get in the car.”
When her phone finally rang, Caroline took it outside and filled Tracey in on the latest.
“I told you this guy was bad news,” Tracey chastised.
“He is not bad news. I’m the one who’s going around screwing my whole life up.”
“Things have gone too far…listen to yourself!”
Caroline held the phone away from her face as Tracey’s muffled voice shouted from the receiver. She slowly brought it closer to her ear in time to hear, “How has this one random guy screwed you up this much? I’ve never heard you act like this—not even when you first met Clay.”
“I didn’t feel this way about Clay.” Caroline’s voice shook with guilt.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“I don’t know, Tray. It’s just…different,” she said, as she stumbled for the right words.
“Well, you have to stop talking to him,” Tracey insisted.
“I can’t do that,” Caroline admitted flatly.
“Can’t, or won’t?”
“Probably a little of both, I think.”
“Do you even love Clay any more?”
The question’s brutal honesty stung and Caroline winced. “Of course I love Clay.”
“Can you imagine not being with him?” Tracey asked coldly.
A sick feeling washed over Caroline. “Just the idea of that makes me want to throw up.”
“Good,” Tracey said with relief.
“Good?” Caroline asked, confused.
“Not being with Clay makes you sick to think about…that’s a good thing. You love him more than you think you do. Hey, I’m at my mom’s. Can I call you later?”
“Of course. Tell Mom I miss her.” Caroline thought back to the many times she and Johnny had gone to Tracey’s mother’s house during college. With the home-cooked meals and the constant fussing, being there felt like being home.
Conflict overwhelmed Caroline’s mind as she took a deep breath and headed back into the office. What if Tracey was right?
****
Clay had noticed that since Caroline’s return from New York, things hadn’t been the same. She was different somehow, distant. He wouldn’t have thought much of it if the whole promotion discussion hadn’t come up last night.
He wandered the halls of his office when Gina, a pretty brunette who was also an intern, walked up to him. “Can I help you with anything, Clay?”