I was in the middle of it, holding the sword of a saint.
Staggered, I squeezed my eyes closed, not sure how to accept that this was the way they viewed me.
Like I was their hero when I’d been the one to blame. When I’d been so close to ruining everything for Grace and her family because I’d gone after a girl I knew I could never keep.
Then my staggered world froze when Grace looked up, that sea of bottomless blue capturing me.
Taking me over.
Flooding me with so much love I didn’t know how to stand.
She stood slowly, like she was in her own shock, unsure that I would come.
Her sweet body trembled all over.
But it was her belly that was big and round that sent me reeling forward, feet barely functioning as I fumbled across the space.
Drawn.
Energy lashing.
Awareness and need and awe.
She rounded the table, those eyes so tender, her heart so sweet.
I dropped to my knees at her feet.
Because it was the girl who had knocked me off of mine.
My hands went to her round stomach, shivers streaking through me at the contact, and her fingers threaded softly through my hair.
“Ian,” she whispered.
A prayer.
My solace.
Moisture gathered in my eyes, and I pressed my forehead to her belly.
Overcome.
“Grace,” I murmured.
My answer.
Because there were some moments in your life when you knew things would never be the same.
I knew I was still messed up. That I had so much to conquer. To realize and forgive and learn.
And still, I knew, right then that this was where I had been meant to be heading all along.
For the first time ever, in all my life, I felt peace.
True, unmitigated peace.
Mallory was dancing around at my side. “And we get a baby! Did you know that, Ian? We get a baby and it’s a boy and I think his name should be Zian Number Two, but Mom said we have to wait so you can decide with us. What do you think?”
I looked up at Grace who was gazing down at me.
Adoration covering me.
Rushing and pummeling.
I pushed to my feet, and her chest heaved, the hammer of her heart fierce, beating for mine. “I’m so glad you came.”
She glanced around the room. “I needed you to be here for this. I needed it so badly, and I wasn’t sure that you would. Still . . . I believed it. Believed in you, that you would come back to us.”
My fingers fluttered down the side of her cheek. Unable to keep from touching her. “I’m not sure I deserve to be here.”
Devotion oozed from Grace’s expression, everything so intense as she spoke to me, “You deserve this more than anyone. You deserve everything. You saved us. Sacrificed in a way I never could have asked anyone to do. You’ve loved me in a way no one has ever loved me. You deserve to live, Ian. And I know I’m still asking so much of you. But I can’t pretend like I don’t want more. That I don’t want it all. All of you.”
Thomas had come to our sides, holding little Sophie’s hand, and Mallory was dancing around, still holding her book.
Emotion surged.
Overpowering.
Everything I never imagined I could have.
A family.
I didn’t think I’d ever been so scared in my life.
Or ever so sure of anything.
“I’m terrified, Grace. Terrified of what I feel for you. For them. For this.” I touched her stomach that shouted of new life.
Of new chances.
Hands shaking like crazy, I burrowed my fingers into Grace’s hair, cupping her on either side of the neck and running my thumbs along her jaw. No fucks given that we had an audience.
That people were watching.
Hell, I wanted the world to know.
“I love you, Grace. So much. I never wanted it. Not until I met you. You showed me what that meant. You showed me what mattered.”
Her mouth trembled with emotion, those blue eyes brimming with moisture. “I love you, Ian Jacobs. Stay with me. Forever. Let’s live again.”
“Forever and ever,” I murmured, the quiet promise rising from my spirit. “You have all of me.”
My eyes dropped to those sweet, lush lips. I dipped down and captured her mouth.
A profession.
A claim.
A promise.
Kisses are only for the ones you love most.
Pride billowed, and I was smiling against her mouth, unable to stop.
She was laughing under it, curling her fingers in my shirt.
Everyone cheered.
“I love you,” I whispered again, looking down when I felt something tugging at my pants.
Sophie had her little hands fisted in the material, grinning up at me with her trusting smile. She lifted her arms, and I picked her up, my spirit trembling when I did.
Mallory wrapped her arms around one of my legs, hugging me tight. “I love you, Ian-Zian, the greatest hero in all the land. But you’re a real kind of hero, did you know that? You saved us forever.”
My heart tremored, and I ran my fingers through her pin-straight hair as she smiled up at me. “I think it’s you who saved me.”
I glanced around at all of them. “All of you.”
Thomas didn’t seem to quite know what to do, and I met his stoic gaze, praying he could see.
Like he got it, felt it, he rushed for us and threw his arms around Grace and me.
“I’m so glad you came back,” he cried, his face buried in the lower part of my chest.
“Where else could I go?”
I pressed my face into Grace’s neck, against the steady, unwavering beat of her pulse.
Where else could I go?
The five of us just stood there. Hugging tight. Refusing to let go.
Right where we belonged.
Forever and ever.
Epilogue
Ian
The barest breeze whispered through the branches, a slow, mournful cry that twisted through the heavens.
I stood at her grave that was marked by a cheap, flat stone, the etching only her name and the dates that marked her birth and her death.
There were no claims of beloved mother or daughter or wife. There were no scriptures or sayings about a soul lost too soon that would never be forgotten.
A shiver raced down my spine when the presence stepped up beside me. Grace threaded her fingers through mine.
My support.
My consolation.
My reason.
I squeezed her hand tightly, my chest stretched so tight I was struggling to pull a breath into my lungs, grief a blur in my eyes as I inched forward and knelt at the place where my mother had been laid to rest.
And I prayed that she was.
At rest.
At peace.
That she knew that I forgave her.
Grace eased up behind me and set her hand on my shoulder. I reached up and gripped it tightly, needing her comfort and her love and her support.
Eyes squeezed tight, I exhaled a tremor of remorse and my own peace.
Because kneeling there, I knew it was time to forgive myself.
I turned my head so I could press my mouth to the inside of Grace’s wrist before I released it and pressed my fingers to my lips.
With that hand shaking, I reached out and touched my mother’s headstone.
Kisses are for the ones you love most.
* * *
I knelt in front of Grace and slipped the cream-colored shoe onto her foot. “There,” I whispered, gazing up at her. “To misplaced slippers.”
She smiled down at me, all that blonde hair cascading around her.
My angel.
My Cinderella.
My wife.
She reached out and caressed my face, the bangle on her wrist tinkling as the charms knocked together as it slipped down her forearm.
A ruby, a diamond, a sapphire, and an amethyst.
I pushed to standing and held out my hand. Grace accepted it, allowing me to help her stand. She stumbled a little.
I smirked. “Knocking you off your feet.”
“Good thing you’re always there to catch me.”
I leaned forward, pressed my mouth to hers, slipped my hand down her delicate neck. “Always.”
“Always,” she whispered back.
I stepped back, taking her hand. “We’d better go or we’re going to be late.”
“I still can’t believe this is happening. Are you happy?”
I fiddled with an errant piece of her hair, staring at the woman who had changed everything.