“You shouldn’t have.”
Thirty-Eight
Ian
“What the fuck are you going to do?” Jace demanded below his breath.
Ripping at my hair, I paced the parlor at Jace’s place. A goddamned panther who was going to claw his way out and take everyone down with me when I did it.
Mack was sitting at the bar, grim expression on his face.
My attention darted their way. “Whatever the fuck I have to do.”
Mack shook his head. “This is messy, brother.”
“You think I don’t know that?” I spat.
It was a motherfucking mess.
A disaster.
That meteor I’d felt coming had finally broken through the atmosphere, nothing but a ball of obliteration that had made landfall.
An implosion no one had seen coming.
But I should have.
I fucking should have.
Fury boiled my blood, the hatred so intense the only thing I saw was red.
Worst part was Grace’s face when I’d walked away.
When I’d left her standing there like the asshole I’d warned her I was.
Her giving heart bleeding all over the ground after I’d trampled it.
But I had to.
I had to so there would be no mistake.
She was better off without me.
What could one dance hurt?
Everything.
Everything.
Ruin it all. And I was the bastard who’d gone after it when she’d warned me she couldn’t get involved. When she’d told me there was more going on than I could see. Then like some kind of arrogant fucker, I’d thought I’d be the one who’d right her world.
Steady it on its spinning axis.
And I would. If it was the last fucking thing I did, I would. Didn’t have anything left to lose, anyway.
Mack sighed and ran his palm over the scruff on his face. “They are painting you as the bad guy here, Ian. Reed has garnered the sympathy of every damned voter in the county. They think the poor guy almost lost his kids over the election.”
I paced some more. Rage blistering out with every violent step. “It’s right there, man. It’s right there. I just don’t know how to put my finger on it. Everything I need to put that fucker away is right there.”
Mack studied me while Jace nervously ran his hand over his head. He’d been in the middle of his own bullshit not long ago. The last thing he needed was a repeat.
“So, what . . . she has some photos that could be construed as incriminating?” Mack hedged, the insinuation that her evidence didn’t prove anything hanging in the dense air. I had little to nothing to go on.
Especially when a man like Reed made things that didn’t look so pretty go away.
Disappear.
My head shook as I tried to calculate. “But it’s more than that. Thomas . . . her oldest. He overheard someone in Reed’s office who was threatening Grace.”
“Who?” Mack’s entire demeanor went rigid. The guardian coming out to defend.
Frustration pursed my lips. “He didn’t get a look at him.”
His eyes moved over my face. “Not a whole lot to go on there, either, man. We have to have something solid to get a warrant.”
I whirled around, chest nothing but a jackhammer that’d sped out of control. “Night before last . . . I went by Reed’s place in the middle of the night. Lawrence Bennet was there . . . outside his house . . . having a little powwow with our friend Reed.” It was a scrape of icy sarcasm.
In shock, Mack reared back. “Fuck. Are you sure?”
I gave him a tight nod.
Awareness spun. Like the guy was adding it up. Solving a riddle he’d been trying to piece for years. “Goddamn it, Ian. I told you to get away from that piece of shit. He’s dirty as fuck.”
No shit.
Same as me.
“You think he’s involved with Reed in some way?” he pressed.
My voice was tight. “I don’t know. The only thing I know is none of this sits well. Lawrence has been pushing me harder, and I’ve been pushing back. Then he showed up at Reed’s place the night after I kicked Reed’s ass? Gut tells me something is going down.”
A heavy sound pulled from Jace’s chest. “Reed knows the whole town. It wouldn’t be that odd for a man who owns as much property as Lawrence does to be an associate.”
Mack was watching me when he answered Jace, “Don’t know about you, but in my experience, not a whole lot of business goes down in the middle of the night other than the dirty kind.”
Worry tripped through Mack’s expression. “Need you to tell me straight. How deep are you?”
“Not deep enough,” I told him.
But I knew I was about to get deeper.
Agitated, fucking broken in a way I never should have allowed myself to be, I scrubbed a palm over my face. “Listen . . . I’m going to get out of here. See if I can figure anything out.”
Mack stood and slowly walked over to me and set a hand on my shoulder. He squeezed. “Think you should lie low, man. With this shitstorm of a media frenzy, the last thing you need is to be drawing more attention to you or Grace. Let me dig. See what I can find. It would be best if you could remove yourself from the whole situation. Let the cops do the footwork.”
“I can’t just sit idle, man. I have to do something. I know I’m missing something. I can feel it right there, just out of reach.”
Understanding dawned in his eyes. “You love her.”
Agony pulsed through my spirit.
Grief.
Sorrow.
I bit it back.
“Doesn’t matter what I feel. Only thing that matters is her getting custody of her kids.”
Warily, he nodded. “I get it. I get it. But you’ve got to be careful. Don’t make this worse than it already is. Gut tells me Reed would love to see you go down.”
“I’m already down. Not sure he could kick me any farther.”
Mack sent me a look that called bullshit. He knew my connections went deep, tied to Bennet in a way that was dangerous.
I stared right back. Promising she was worth it.
He nodded again. “Call me if you think of anything, and I’ll see what I can pull together.”
Jace rounded the bar. “Both of us . . . we’re here to back you up. Just . . . don’t do anything stupid. Two of us will be here for you, however you need us to be.”
My attention bounced between the two of them. “Thank you.”
Jace shook his head. “You’re my brother, Ian. From the beginning, we’ve had each other’s backs. That’s not ever gonna change.”
He squeezed my shoulder. Tightly.
I nodded.
Mack pulled me in for a hug, his voice low at my ear. “Call me. I’m on standby. Let’s take this fucker down.”
Bastard already had me on my knees.
There wouldn’t be any standing.
Only standing I could do was for Grace.
I walked out and headed for the door.
I froze when I heard the soft voice hit me from behind. “Ian.”
Slowly, I turned, not really wanting to see the pity that would be written all over Faith. The woman was too kind for me to handle.
Not when the only thing I wanted right then was blood on my hands.
To get dirty.
Depraved and wicked.
The way I’d always known myself to be.
Her lips twisted into a sad smile. “Here. I found this in the kitchen. Thomas left it.”
Didn’t think it was possible, but the spec that was my blackened heart sank to the pit of my stomach.
Chest a fist of heartache.
Thomas’s tablet.
I reached out and took it, trying to keep my damned hand from shaking. “Thank you.”
She looked to the ground, tentative when she peeked back up at me. “I’m so sorry, Ian. I saw you with Grace. With her children. There’s nothing more terrifying than the people we love most being in danger.”
I wanted to refute it.
Tell her there was no love lost.
Didn’t have it in me to tell a lie that big.
I just opened the door and stepped out onto the porch.
Cold air blew in low. A shiver raced my skin, but it didn’t have a fucking thing to do with the wind.