I pull open the drawer and push things out of the way. It looks like a junk drawer. Old receipts, file folders, loose change. A condom in the back. I laugh and pull it out, flipping it over in my fingers. “It expired three years ago.” I look at Graham and he’s staring at the condom in my hand like he’s wondering how accurate expiration dates are. I slip the condom into my bra. “I’m keeping it.”
Graham smiles appreciatively at me. I like the way he looks at me. I’ve felt cute before. Beautiful, even. But I’m not sure I’ve ever known what sexy felt like until him.
Graham leans forward again, scooting to the edge of his bed. He crooks his finger, wanting me to come closer. He has that look in his eyes again. The look he had that night in the restaurant when he touched my knee. That look sends the same heat through me now, just like it did then.
I take a few steps, but stop a couple of feet from him. He sits up straight. “Come closer, Quinn.” The desire in his voice whirls through my chest and stomach.
I take another step. He slides his hand around the back of my knee and pulls me the last step toward him. Chills break out on my legs and arms from his touch.
He’s looking up at me and I’m looking down at him. His bed sits low to the floor, so his mouth is dangerously close to my panty line. I swallow when the hand he has wrapped around my leg begins to slide slowly up the back of my thigh.
I’m not prepared for the sensation his touch sends through me. I close my eyes and sway a little, steadying myself with two firm hands on his shoulders. I look down at him again, just as he presses his lips against the dress covering my stomach.
He holds eye contact with me as he slides his other hand to the back of my other thigh. I’m completely engulfed by my own heartbeat. I feel it everywhere, all at once.
Graham begins to bunch my dress up in his hands, little by little, crawling it up my thighs. He slides his hands and the dress up to my waist, then presses his mouth to the top of my thigh. I move my hands to his hair, gasping quietly as his lips move over my panties.
Holy shit.
I can feel the intense heat from his mouth as he kisses me there. It’s a soft kiss, right against the front of my panties, but it doesn’t matter how soft it is. I feel it all the way to my core and it makes me shudder.
I clench my fingers in his hair, pressing myself closer to his mouth. His hands are on my ass now, pulling me toward him. The soft kisses begin to turn into firm kisses and before he even has the chance to pull down my panties, a tremor starts to rush through me, unexpected, sudden, explosive.
I pull away from him with a whimper, but he pulls me back to his mouth, kissing me there harder until I’m gripping his shoulders, needing his strength to continue standing. My whole body begins to shudder and I struggle to remain quiet and remain upright as the whole bedroom spins around me.
My arms are shaking and my legs are weak as his kisses come to a stop. He slides his mouth against my thigh and looks up at me. It takes everything in me to hold eye contact with him as he pushes my dress up a little more and presses a kiss against the bare skin of my stomach.
Graham grips me at the waist. I’m completely out of breath and a little in shock at what just happened. And how fast it happened. And the fact that I want more of him. I want to lower myself on top of him and put this condom to use.
As if he can read my mind, Graham says, “How accurate do you think that expiration date is?”
I lower myself onto his lap and straddle him, feeling just how serious his question was. I brush my lips across his. “I’m sure the expiration date is just a precaution.”
Graham grabs the back of my head and dips his tongue inside my mouth, kissing me with a groan. He slips his fingers in my bra and pulls out the condom, then stops kissing me long enough to tear it open with his teeth. He turns me, pushing me onto his Star Wars comforter. I hook my thumbs inside my panties and slide them off as he unzips his jeans. I’m lying back on the bed as he kneels onto the mattress and puts the condom on. I don’t even get a good look at him before he lowers himself on top of me.
He kisses me as he begins to slowly push himself into me. My whole body tenses and I moan. Maybe a little too loudly, because he laughs against my mouth. “Shh,” he says against my lips with a smile. “We’re supposed to be touring the house right now. Not each other.”
I laugh, but as soon as he begins to push into me again, I hold my breath.
“Jesus, Quinn.” He breathes against my neck and then thrusts against me. We’re both a little too loud now. He holds still once he’s inside me, both of us doing our best to stay as quiet as we can. He begins to move, causing me to gasp, but he covers my mouth with his, kissing me deeply.
He alternates between kissing me and watching me, doing both things with an intensity I’m not sure I’ve ever experienced. He pauses his lips so that they hover just above mine, occasionally brushing them as we fight to remain silent. He keeps his eyes focused on mine while he moves inside of me.
He’s kissing me again when he starts to come.
His tongue is deep inside my mouth and the only reason I know he’s about to finish is because he holds his breath and stops moving for a few seconds. It’s so subtle as he fights to remain as quiet as possible. The muscles in his back clench beneath my palms and he never once breaks eye contact when he finally does pull away from my lips.
I wait for him to collapse on top of me, out of breath, but he doesn’t. He somehow holds himself up after it’s over, watching me like he’s scared he might miss something. He dips his head and kisses me again. And even when he pulls out of me, he still doesn’t collapse on top of me. He puts all his weight on his side as he eases down beside me without breaking the kiss.
I slide my hand through his hair and hold him against my mouth. We kiss for so long, I almost forget where I am.
When he breaks for air, he watches me silently for a moment, his hand still on my cheek, and then he dips his head and kisses me again like he doesn’t know how to stop. I don’t think I know how to stop this, either. I wish more than anything we were somewhere else. My place . . . his place . . . anywhere other than a place where we have to stop and go back upstairs eventually.
I am not inexperienced when it comes to sex. But I think I am inexperienced when it comes to this. The feeling of not wanting it to be over long after it’s over. The feeling of wishing I could bury myself inside his chest so I could be closer to him. Maybe this isn’t new for him, but based on the way he’s looking at me between all the kissing, I would say there’s more confusion in his expression than familiarity.
Several seconds pass as we stare at each other. Neither of us speaks. Maybe he doesn’t have anything to say, but I can’t speak because of the severe intensity building inside my chest. The sex was great. Quick, but incredible.
But this thing that’s happening right now . . . the not being able to let go . . . the not wanting to stop kissing . . . the not being able to look away . . . I can’t tell if this is just a side to sex I’ve never experienced or if this goes deeper than that. Like maybe sex isn’t as deep as it gets. Maybe there’s a whole level of connection I didn’t know could exist.
Graham closes his eyes for a few seconds, then presses his forehead against mine. After releasing a quick sigh, he pushes himself off me, almost as if he had to force his eyes shut in order to separate us. He helps me up and I look for my panties while he disposes of the condom and zips up his jeans.
It’s quiet while I dress. We don’t look at each other. He picks up the empty condom wrapper from the floor and tosses it into the trash can beside his bed.
Now we’re facing each other. My arms are crossed over my chest and he’s looking at me like he isn’t sure if the last fifteen minutes actually happened. I’m looking at him like I wish it could happen again.
He opens his mouth like he’s about to say something, but then he just gives his head a quick shake and steps forward, grabs my face and kisses me again. It’s a rough kiss, like he isn’t finished with me. I kiss him back with just as much intensity. After a minute of the kiss, he starts to walk me backward toward the stairs. We break for air and he just laughs, pressing his lips into my hair.